Chapter 3
||tape seven||
"I am kinda happy today." Mara started by saying.
Her eyes are a bit shining than they had been on the last tape.
"Wanna know why?" She asked smiling a bit.
"My mom visited me yesterday, after a month, though." She forced a smile.
"Even though I hated her because I thought she had forgotten about me and despite the fact that she was afraid of me and she couldn't even hold my hand, I still love her."
Decton smiled, remembering how Mara always used to complain about her mother to him and telling him that she hates her and she'll never talk to her again, but she always end up crying because she miss her.
"I asked her about you." She said.
" And this time she couldn't lie to me after the doctor told her about what had happened last time with the nurse.
She knew I'll get very very angry and do something no one would like." Mara said as if it was no big deal before she smiled.
Not a normal smile, but a mental one.
"She said that you're not doing very well and that you're miserable."
Decton scoffed because Mara was right.
"But why would you be?
You're not the one who's stuck in here."
Just to let you know, Decton receives a tape each month.
So, Mara has been in the institution for seven months.
||tape eight||
Mara sat on the wooden chair.
Her arms crossed over her chest and just staring at the camera, with eyes cold and exhausted.
Decton run his long fingers through his hair, messing it.
He looked back at the screen and shook his head.
"You would be so disgusted by me if you see me now.
I know you would." Mara finally spoke.
"But I bet you're still so damn hot as you always were.
Dude even when you woke up, you were beautiful and beautiful isn't even a word for guys."
Decton smiled.
He was sat on their bed, at the apartment they both shared.
He was hugging Mara's small pillow tight to his chest, quietly breathing in her smell.
He was thinking how much he loved the way she smell, just like chocolate.
"If you want me to be completely honest," Mara sighed.
"I feel like shit right now." She frowned and Decton shook his head.
"Do you know why?
Because I only feel beautiful when I'm around you.
You make me feel the happiest and the luckiest girl in the world and without you I can't do anything, be anything or be anyone because the person I love has forgotten about me."
Decton shook his head, only because mara was wrong this time.
He didn't forget her, he would never do and never will.
|| tape nine ||
Decton put the tape in the dvd.
"My mind is talking to me again."
Decton's eyes widened and he haven't even got the chance to look up at the screen before Mara's voice spoke through the speakers.
His head quickly looked up at the screen.
He knew what Mara meant by 'my mind is talking to me'.
"It's scaring me as hell right now, because it's telling me the things you used to tell me to not believe them." She still hadn't looked at the camera.
"He left and he's not coming back, because he never loved you anyway." They say.
"Just do it and you'll finally be happy."
"It was easier to ignore them before, because you were always with me." She looked up at the camera, her eyes bloodshot.
"But now, you're not here and they're only getting darker and darker." Mara run her shaky hand through her pink hair as she bounced her leg on the floor.
"You aren't here anymore to calm me down."
"I don't know how to shut them down anymore.
I tried to drown them but it turned out they know how to swim.
I'm starting to give in." Mara stood up and started pacing around the room, running her hand through her hair none stop.
"I'm slowly losing the sanity that had left." She whispered to herself but Decton heard it.
She walked over to the camera." You know what the fucking doctor told me yesterday?" She asked.
" He said I'm sorry Mara but life isn't for everyone and I think he's right." She said.
"Life isn't for me."
||tape ten||
"I hate you Decton Walsh." Mara neared to the camera that Decton could clearly see every detail of her face.
He felt his heart fall to his feets and shatter into pieces when the word 'hate' left her pale pink lips.
He was used to her saying that word a lot, almost to everyone she sees but that was the first time she said it to him and when she said it with his last name, he knew she meant it.
"Because you knew damn well that I could only be happy with you." Her tears fell quickly on her cheeks but she whipped them with the back of her hand.
"So, for the last time if you're watching this, then i'm already dead."