Chapter 5
"Are you done making a scene?" Lucas snapped, his voice tight with anger.
He hauled me up from the floor, veins bulging at his temples as fury radiated off him.
I wrenched my hand free and stumbled back several steps.
I shot him a look of pure disgust and said, "Lucas, don't you dare touch me."
"You think throwing a tantrum like this will make me go back to pampering you, indulging you, loving you like before?" Lucas sneered.
I scoffed, "Save it. Go shower your precious Sophia with all that love instead."
Lucas stared at me, looking like he could barely breathe. He tugged at his tie and asked, "Can you just stop making a scene?"
Making a scene? If only I still had the time to waste on pointless drama.
A sharp pain stabbed at my chest, stealing my breath.
My whole body shook, but I refused to let Lucas see, not a tremor, not a sign.
I gripped my suitcase and forced myself forward, choking it all down as I hurried away.
But Lucas grabbed my wrist and demanded, "Where do you think you're going at this hour?"
I tried to shake him off, but his grip was like iron.
The pain made my temper snap.
I spun around and slapped him hard across the face. I shot back, "What's it to you? Do you really think your love is so precious? Do you think I ever wanted it? Who do you think you are?"
Lucas was left dazed by my slap, his eyes burning with fury as he stared at me.
Without looking back, I started walking away, one step at a time.
When I first came here, my heart was overflowing with love.
Now, all that love had turned to dust inside me.
I walked into the freezing winter wind and the pitch-black night.
Step by step, I left behind the place I'd lived in for six years.
It felt like I was walking away from my entire life.
It was late at night when I finally reached the hospital, and seeing the doctor felt like someone had thrown me a lifeline.
The pain was absolutely unbearable.
It hurt so much that I honestly wished I were dead.
But I couldn't. My dad still needed me.
I had to see him get better, watch him beat this illness. Only then could I finally leave with peace of mind.
This time, the pain was worse than ever. I barely slept a wink, the agony keeping me up all night.
The hospital room was anything but quiet. The guy in the next bed was crying out like a child all night long.
In the early hours, he just couldn't take it anymore. He grabbed a fruit knife and stabbed himself straight in the heart.
I watched as his face twisted in agony, then slowly relaxed into peace.
He was finally free from all that pain.
But I still had to endure it all. For a moment, I actually envied him.
The next day, the doctor put me on heavy-duty meds, the only thing that made life barely bearable.
After I visited my dad, I finally called Lucas in the afternoon.
"Do you have time to go finalize the divorce?" I asked, my voice flat.
Lucas paused for a few seconds, then said, "Come wait for me in my office. There are some details in the agreement I want to revise."
"What details? Just go ahead and change it yourself," I replied, my voice flat.
"It's about the money," he said.
"You think 7 million is too much?" I shot back.
"I'm tied up in a meeting right now. Just come over to my office and talk to my lawyer directly," Lucas said.
Then he hung up on me.
Resigned, I made my way to the Sterling Group.
When I got there, Lucas wasn't in his office.
His assistant told me to take a seat and wait, then left the room.
I waited for a while, feeling jittery and on edge.
Ever since I got sick, my moods have been a mess. I was irritable, quick to lose my temper.
Love, romance: none of that meant anything to me then.
Love only existed when life was comfortable and sweet; sickness left no room for it.
Knowing that Sophia and her daughter once sat in this office was enough to make me sick.
My patience was wearing thin. I stood up, ready to march straight into the conference room and find Lucas myself.
But just as I got up, my gaze was instantly drawn to the tablet on Lucas's desk.
A video was playing on the screen.
It was a montage of a boy growing up, featuring moments from infancy through his teenage years.
I stood there, stunned for a moment, then slowly walked over.
The kid looked just like Lucas and a little like me, too.
I knew that was my kid, Shawn.
He had gotten so big already.
He must be about three now.
He was really adorable.
But I would never get to hold him in my arms, kiss his little cheeks, or hear him call me "Mom."
He wouldn't have a mother in his life anymore.
Out of nowhere, a crushing sadness hit me.
This world hurt so much, but I still had so many reasons to stay. I didn't want to die.
As my fingers brushed Shawn's face on the screen, my tears spilled over before I even realized it.