Chapter 6
"Sebastian, Sophie's having another episode!" Jessica's voice pierced through the phone. "She's been calling your name."
Sophie was sobbing her heart out on the other end. "Sebastian, don't you want me anymore?"
Then came the sound of something shattering.
Sebastian absently gripped the spatula, his knuckles going white.
"I have... some work stuff..." His voice went weak, and his eyes kept flicking my way. "I'll go... in a bit..."
"She's hurting herself again!" Jessica's piercing cry sent a shudder through Sebastian. "Blood is everywhere!"
Sebastian's phone slipped from his hand and clattered to the floor.
He fumbled to pick it up, his voice trembling. "I... I'll be there right away..."
After hanging up, he stood there, looking uneasy, fidgeting with his phone.
"Sophie..." He hesitated, then gently held my hand. "I'll be back soon. Will you be okay by yourself?"
I nodded calmly and even gave him a smile. "Yeah. You can go."
He breathed a sigh of relief and quickly grabbed his coat.
Before heading out, he paused to remind me. "The soup's still in the pot, and your meds are on the table."
Once he saw me nod, he headed out in a hurry.
The moment the door closed, I heard his footsteps rushing down the stairs, so urgent, so familiar.
I set the bowl aside. The soup was cold.
Feeling numb, I swallowed the sleeping pills the doctor had given me.
The bitter pills melted under my tongue, each one cutting like shards of broken glass.
The meds hit me almost instantly, my thoughts scattering as the world faded away, blurry and far-off.
I curled up on the hospital bed, letting the darkness devour whatever was left of my awareness.
The next morning, the blinding sunlight dragged me out of the fog.
My head was splitting as I noticed my phone screen kept lighting up.
There were more than a dozen unread messages. As soon as I opened them, Sophie's sharp voice pierced through my eardrums. [Sebastian actually said you need someone to keep you company now?]
In the first voice message, she let out a cold laugh. [He said he feels guilty about you?]
My fingers started trembling uncontrollably.
The next voice message went on: [Stop playing the victim. You really think you can keep him around by using your depression?]
Her voice suddenly went shrill. [You slut. Jealous that he cares about me, so you play dirty.]
My phone buzzed again. It was a photo.
There was Sebastian, sitting by Sophie's hospital bed, his eyes full of tenderness.
Her text: [Look, even if you are depressed, he's with me. Don't ever think you can take him from me.]
My breathing grew rapid, and everything around me started to blur, black spots dancing in my vision.
Another message popped up. [Someone like you will never be loved.]
Her voice was maliciously cheerful. [If you're sick, then die already. Someone like you is just a waste of space.]
My phone hit the floor with a smack.
I scrambled up and lurched toward the medicine cabinet.
My hands shook as I opened the bottle. The white tablets poured out, scattering everywhere.
Sophie's voice was haunting me, echoing in my head. [Pathetic loser, nobody cares about you.]
[If you're sick, then die already. Someone like you is just a waste of space.]
I grabbed a fistful of pills and shoved them into my mouth, the bitter powder sticking in my throat, making me gag.
But I kept swallowing, handful after handful, like I was trying to force down every bit of misery I'd ever felt.
The person in the mirror looked deathly pale, with pill powder smeared at the corner of her mouth.
I smiled at that stranger in the mirror, and suddenly, it all seemed absurd.
Turns out, even my suffering was just something they used to win sympathy.