Chapter 3

When morning came, my head felt heavy and the world spun. When I opened my eyes, Benjamin was asleep outside the tent with a bunch of coats thrown over him.

So he really hadn't gotten too close to her. But the moment I remembered how he took the one thing that kept me alive and handed it to her, forgiveness didn't even seem possible.

My head throbbed, and staying curled up only made it worse, so I forced myself to sit up.

Right then, Zoe crawled out of the tent.

She crouched next to Benjamin, touched his face, and looked at him with this soft, intimate expression.

I frowned, dragged myself out of the sleeping bag, and walked over. With clumsy signs I asked, "What are you doing?"

Zoe jumped like I'd scared her and shrank toward Benjamin.

He woke up, disoriented. "What's going on?"

Zoe threw herself into his arms, eyes full of tears, and the sight twisted something deep in my stomach.

I stared at Benjamin. His hand was on her back, gently calming her, while he looked at me with eyes colder than the mountain wind.

I couldn't hold it back. "Who's your wife here?!"

He shot me a look sharper than ice. "Just because Zoe's younger and prettier, you're gonna go after her like this?"

I froze.

Younger and prettier?

Is that why he barely came home this past year?

Because I wasn't young or pretty enough?

Zoe kept acting fragile, her hands flying in little signs. I forced myself to read them. "It's my fault," she signed. "You had snow on your forehead and I brushed it off. I didn't mean to make you misunderstand."

Understanding her only made the anger burn hotter.

She was the type to play innocent while doing exactly what she wanted.

I looked straight at Benjamin, ignoring her act. "She's flirting with you right in front of me. You seriously can't see that?"

Benjamin pulled Zoe to his side like he was making some kind of statement. The tenderness and worry in his eyes almost spilled over, a look I hadn't seen directed at me for nearly a year.

When he looked at me though, all I got was a sharp glare, anger simmering. "Are you done? Is every woman around me someone you have to interrogate?"

I opened my mouth, but the words, along with the hurt, just sank back down my throat.

He always knew exactly where to stab so it would hurt the most.

After he made it big, beautiful, well-educated women started showing up around him.

And because of my childhood scars, I checked his phone all the time, making sure he stayed loyal.

Benjamin never blew up. He knew my past.

Years ago, after my dad's startup took off, he ditched my mom and me and married someone else.

My mom worked herself sick for years. Now she was bedridden.

The shadow that left on me never really went away.

Benjamin and I had been together since school. I stuck with him through every rough patch. And now that he'd made it, he wanted me to learn all those high-society manners.

But I could never blend in with those polished rich ladies. Every word out of their mouths felt practiced. Draining. And I hated the flattering, the pretending, the fake smiles.

I liked being the strategist behind the scenes, his partner, his right hand.

Somewhere along the line, I stopped being his strategist and turned into his maid.

Whenever my insecurity flared up, Benjamin would tell me, "Audrey, come here. If it helps, check my phone anytime. I can handle it."

Even though I asked a hundred times whether he loved me, whether he'd fall for someone else, he always answered patiently, "I love you, Audrey.

"If you're unsure, ask me a thousand times or ten thousand. I'll reassure you every single time."

Little by little, I let go of my fear and loved him boldly, fiercely.