Chapter 4
Lucy was put in a VIP hospital room. Ethan was right there, waiting on her hand and foot, feeding her oatmeal.
The second she saw me, the tears started pouring out. She tried to scramble out of bed.
"Lila, please don't be mad. If you want me to beg for your forgiveness, I will. Just please, let me off the hook," she sobbed.
Ethan carried her back to bed, then gave me a helpless look and started in on me.
"Lila, isn't this enough drama already? Now you're following us to the hospital just to cause a scene?" he said.
Then he noticed the bruise on my face. He paused for a second, and his voice softened.
"Lila, you really need to stop being so paranoid all the time. There's nothing going on between me and Lucy. You're my wife. The only one. That's not going to change," he said.
Lucy shot me a plaintive look.
When I didn't say anything, Ethan sighed and moved closer. He reached out to touch my face.
"You didn't even think to put some ice on it?" he asked.
I pulled the divorce papers out of my bag, dodged his hand, and held them out to him.
"Just sign it," I said,.
My signature was already on it.
"Lila, are you done?" he snapped, clearly at the end of his rope.
He grabbed the divorce papers from my hand and tossed them at my feet.
"Why can't you just be good and behave? Things were so much better when you were like before," he muttered.
Like before?
For a while, the medication did make me numb and easy to handle.
Ethan went back to being attentive and caring, like when we first got married.
But the second Lucy called and said, "Ethan, I'm scared," he'd drop me without a second thought.
I felt so miserable that I just wanted to disappear, but I didn't dare call him. I'd hide in the bathroom, crying, swallowing one pill after another, until I couldn't feel anything anymore.
Guess this is what he called "better."
"Ethan, I'm really sick. Let me go, so I can have a chance to get better, okay?" I said.
I picked up the divorce papers from the floor, barely feeling anything, and held them out to him again.
"You..." Ethan was so angry that he couldn't even get the words out. He just stood there, locked in a standoff with me.
"It's all my fault! It's all on me." Lucy, still in bed, suddenly burst out crying, clutching her head.
She wailed, "Lila, do I have to die for you to forgive Ethan? Do I have to disappear for you two to finally be okay? Fine, I'll just die right here. Is that what you want?"
She jumped up and made a run for the wall, like she was about to smash her head into it.
"Lucy!" Ethan shouted, panic in his voice. He lunged forward and caught her before she could hurt herself.
"Don't do anything stupid. Who told you to die? I won't let you!" he shouted.
He held Lucy tight, rubbing her back. Then he turned and glared at me, fury burning in his eyes.
"Lila, how many times do I have to tell you? There's nothing between me and Lucy! Do you have to push her until she kills herself to be satisfied?" he yelled.
So it was my fault again?
I just stood there, watching the scene unfold in front of me.
Honestly, they really did look like a pair of star-crossed lovers, torn apart by the wicked ex-wife—me.
Let's just say it was all my fault.
"Lucy, you don't have to die," I said. My voice was so soft that Ethan didn't even hear me.
"I'll handle this myself," I said.
The second the words left my mouth, I ran toward the window.
"Lila!" Ethan's voice tore through the air, raw and anguished.
The wind was strong, whipping my hair around.
"Don't..." he shouted behind me.
No suffocation. No pain. No more endless pills. Just nothing.
With a crash, the world finally went quiet.