Chapter 4

Seeing that I really couldn't drink any more coffee, Samuel took me to a restaurant.

I didn't stand on ceremony. For one, I was genuinely starving. For another, I'd helped Samuel secure his position, handled his family matters, and spent a ton of money on him. Having a meal together was only fair.

When the dishes hit the table, my mouth couldn't help but water on the spot.

I hadn't tasted food this good in four years. Most days, I'd grab a couple of slices of bread and choke them down with water.

Eventually, I managed to get myself a little electric kettle. I didn't dare drink unboiled water. In my situation, getting sick wasn't an option. If I ever fell ill, I'd be no different from the old beggar.

Sometimes I thought maybe it'd be easier if I stopped existing.

But whenever I found myself standing at the edge of the bridge, Samuel's smile would always pop into my head.

He was the only person I still cared about in this whole world. Even if all I could do was catch a glimpse of him on the big screen at the mall, that was enough to keep me going.

When he watched me devour my food, Samuel's eyes grew misty with emotion. He poured me a glass of water and said coldly, "Slow down. No one's fighting you for it. Don't eat like you're a starving ghost."

I was stunned, looking up at Samuel.

His gaze was cold and indifferent, and it sent a sharp pain through my chest. I lowered my head and stuffed the food into my mouth.

The delicious dishes now tasted like cardboard. I couldn't taste their flavor at all.

Still, I kept eating, because deep down I knew meals like this might not come around again for a long time.

It was the old beggar who taught me to always fill my belly whenever I could.

Samuel's phone rang. He picked up and said, "Kathryn, what's up?"

It was Kathryn. Samuel shot me a look, then got up and stepped out onto the balcony to talk to her.

Now that Samuel was gone, I finally dared to lift my head.

Watching his tall, slender silhouette, I tried to hold back the sour feeling in my heart.

I ate, stealing glances at Samuel. Every look was one less I'd get. Life had always been like this.

Once I was full, I looked at all the food still left on the table, and then at Samuel, who was still talking to Kathryn on the phone. I dug out a plastic bag from my stuff and started packing up the leftovers.

With the cold weather, these leftovers would keep for days. They'd help me stretch my meal budget for a while.

After packing up the leftovers, I was about to say goodbye to Samuel. But seeing his back, I felt a wave of hesitation wash over me.

After a long pause, I murmured, "Samuel, goodbye."

With a lingering look, I rolled my wheelchair away, unwilling to leave but having no choice.

Just as I was about to head out, Samuel's voice rang out, urgent and a little accusing. "Navy, you're gonna ghost me again?"

He grabbed me, and the plastic bag in my hand tore open. Leftovers scattered everywhere, the greasy smell instantly filling the room.

I felt super uncomfortable all of a sudden.

Samuel stood there, silent, just looking at the food all over the floor.

I let out a bitter laugh. "Guess I must look like a joke to you, huh?"

Samuel didn't say a word. I sighed, gave the food on the floor one last, regretful glance, and was about to leave.

But Samuel called out to me again, his voice trembling. "Navy, honestly, I've always thought you were a joke."

I turned back to look at him.

His face was streaked with tears. Samuel crouched down, ignoring the mess all over me, and collapsed against my knees, crying his heart out.

After a long time, Samuel finally stopped crying. His hands trembled as he carefully and gently touched my legs. A flicker of heartache flashed in his eyes.

After wrestling with his feelings for what felt like forever, Samuel finally spoke, "Navy, will you get back together with me?"

I gazed at Samuel. His face was still the same. But now there was a superior dignity about him, a kind of presence that made him feel both familiar and strangely distant.

I gave a wry smile. "Samuel, when you and Kathryn sold Jennings Group's secrets to my biggest rival, did I ever cross your mind?"