Chapter 4

The lawyer did not tell me to leave Grant.

She gave me one instruction.

"Save copies of the financial and property records you already have access to. Don't move money. Just understand what exists before you make your next decision."

She also sent me a draft petition in case I decided I was ready.

I opened it once.

Then I closed it without signing.

That was enough for now.

When the call ended, I opened the home-security app.

Laura Hale was still listed under Household Access.

I pressed "Remove."

Her name disappeared.

Eleven minutes later, Grant called.

"What did you do to Laura's code?"

"I removed it."

"You had no right to do that without talking to me."

"Did you talk to me before giving it to her?"

"Rachel, she needs access because of Emma."

"She can see Emma. She does not need unlimited access to my home."

"Our home."

"Exactly. Ours. Not hers."

He went quiet.

"You should have discussed this with me."

"You first."

I ended the call.

He came home before six.

I was taking my pain medication when the front door shut hard enough to make me look up.

Grant walked into the kitchen.

"You embarrassed Laura."

"She tried to get in?"

"She was picking something up for Emma."

"Emma can let her in."

"This is ridiculous."

"No. It's a boundary."

"It's my house too."

"I didn't remove your access."

"You don't get to make decisions about Emma's mother by yourself."

I stared at him.

"You gave your ex-wife a key to our home nine weeks ago without telling me."

"Because someone had to keep things running."

"I asked you to help me."

"I did."

"No. You replaced me."

"That's dramatic."

"Is it?"

"Laura helped with Emma while you were sick. That's all."

"You told her school I was stepping back."

"Because you were overwhelmed."

"You gave her access to my home and my place in Emma's life."

"Stop."

The sharpness in his voice cut through mine.

"I'm not going to stand here while you turn every practical decision into a betrayal."

I turned toward the hallway.

Grant caught my upper arm.

"Don't walk away while I'm talking to you."

His pull turned me before my feet moved.

Pain tore across my lower abdomen.

I gasped and grabbed the counter.

"Let go of me."

He released me.

For one second, I thought he would ask if I was okay.

Instead, he looked at my face and said, "I barely touched you."

I stared at him.

The key was no big deal.

Laura was just helping.

The school was just practical.

Now even my pain was too small to count.

As long as Grant could explain what he had done, he believed he had not really hurt me.

He sighed.

"Take your medication. We'll talk when you're calmer."

Something inside me settled.

Not because he finally understood.

Because I finally understood that he wasn't going to.

I walked into the study and closed the door.

The lawyer's prepared petition was still in my inbox.

I had already read it.

I had already thought about the cost--the house, money, and Emma.

None of it felt small.

Neither did staying.

I opened the petition again.

Then I signed my name.

My reply was four words.

"Please file it today."

Downstairs, the television came on.

Grant still thought this was another argument I would eventually smooth over.

At 8:47 p.m., my phone lit up.

"Your divorce petition has been filed."