Chapter 2

Did Lily ever know that Nathan was in love with her?

I wasn't sure.

She was my only friend. She'd always supported me—through school, through work, through everything.

I refused to believe she'd be that kind of person.

Maybe Nathan never told her.

Maybe she genuinely thought Nathan and I would be good together. Maybe that was why she set us up.

Nathan was the one to blame—he lied to me!

I should divorce him!

But what about our kids?

People judged kids from broken homes. And remarriage could screw them up even worse.

I was in my thirties, still recovering from my own messed-up childhood. I couldn't put my kids through that.

I didn't bring them into this world to suffer.

I'd pretend I didn't know.

As long as Nathan kept quiet and I kept quiet, we could keep going like before.

I'd endured worse.

I'd just grit my teeth and wait. The kids would grow up eventually.

Lily was dead anyway. So what if Nathan still loved her?

I was about to close the app when my finger slipped and I scrolled down—and saw Nathan's comment from five minutes ago.

[Now she's gone. I'm torn. I don't know if I should join her.]

The phone slipped from my hand, landing silently on the deep, expensive carpet, not even leaving a scratch.

If I just closed the app and put the phone back, I could pretend this never happened.

No one would ever know my husband was planning to follow my best friend to the grave.

But the tears wouldn't stop. They blurred those devastating words and ruined the makeup I'd spent an hour on.

Some rare, devoted man!

Fine. I'd give him what he wanted.

I quickly closed the app and replied to Nathan from my alt account.

[Go be with her. You've loved her for 20 years—why stop now? Down there, no one will compete with you for her.]

After I hit send, I felt like I'd gone too far.

Even if he never loved me, he always put me and the kids first—making sure we had everything we needed, even more than he did for himself.

He showed up for every holiday, every anniversary, every prenatal class, every family moment.

He set up education funds for both kids the day they were born.

He got a massive life insurance policy with me as the beneficiary, just in case.

By any measure, Nathan was a good man.

If he actually died, the kids would blame me.

I was about to delete my comment when Nathan replied instantly.

[You're right. If you love someone, you stick with them for life. Now I finally get what it means to truly love someone—she won't reject me again.]

Again?

So Nathan had actually confessed to Lily?

All this time, I thought Lily was innocent. My perfect friend.

I believed she just wanted me to be as happy as she was, so she set me up with Nathan, a childhood friend she truly knew.

So, she was just leveraging me to ease her own guilt toward Nathan.

For years, while taking everything I gave her, she accepted every bit of attention Nathan showered on her without batting an eye.

Every time she gushed, "Just look at how Nathan dotes on you! I'm so lucky to have a bestie like you," she was probably mocking me inside.

I was such an idiot.

They played me for years, and I thanked them for it.

Friendship, love—none of it was real.

I wished they'd all just die.

I couldn't stand to look at Nathan, so I started sleeping in the kids' room.

Nathan never came to me.