Chapter 3

The smell of cumin and lime hit me before I even saw them. I was struggling to maneuver my crutches through the hospital parking garage when I spotted Raylan's pristine BMW—the same car he'd once made me vacuum crumbs from after I'd eaten a granola bar during a long drive.

Through the passenger window, I could see Angelina laughing, a street taco halfway to her mouth. Salsa verde dripped onto the cream leather seat as she gestured wildly with her free hand, telling some animated story that had Raylan grinning like a teenager.

"Oh my god, this is so messy," she giggled, sauce splattering across the console. "I'm getting it everywhere!"

"Don't worry about it," Raylan said, his voice warm with affection. "It's just a car."

Just a car. The same car where he'd lectured me for twenty minutes about "respecting our things" when a single crumb from my sandwich had fallen onto the floor mat. The same car where he'd instituted a strict no-food policy that apparently had very selective enforcement.

I watched, frozen on my crutches, as Angelina took another enormous bite, lettuce and tomatoes tumbling onto the seat. Raylan reached over with a napkin, gently wiping sauce from the corner of her mouth with an intimacy that made my stomach clench.

"You're such a mess," he teased, his thumb brushing her cheek. "Good thing you're cute."

The casual touch, the playful tone—it was everything he used to be with me, everything that had disappeared from our marriage so gradually I'd barely noticed until it was gone completely. Now here it was, lavished on someone else while I stood in a parking garage, three months pregnant and balancing on crutches, watching my husband treat another woman with the tenderness he'd forgotten how to show his wife.

I turned away before they could see me, my crutches clicking against the concrete as I made my way to the medical transport van. The driver helped me into the seat, and I spent the entire ride home staring out the window, thinking about sauce-stained leather and double standards.

That evening, Raylan burst through the front door with an energy I hadn't seen in months. His phone was pressed to his ear, and he was laughing at whatever Angelina was saying on the other end.

"No way, that sounds incredible," he said, kicking off his shoes and settling into his chair. "When were you thinking?"

I looked up from the pregnancy book I'd been reading, my leg propped up on the ottoman. "How was your day?"

He held up a finger, still focused on his call. "Yeah, I've always wanted to try that. The rush must be amazing."

Curiosity and dread warred in my chest. I knew that tone, the excitement in his voice when he was planning something he really wanted to do.

"Bungee jumping?" he continued, and my book slipped from my hands. "There's that place about two hours north, right? Perfect. Let's do it this weekend."

Bungee jumping. The words echoed in my head as I remembered every conversation we'd had about adventure sports, every time I'd suggested we try something thrilling together.

"Maybe we could go skydiving for our anniversary," I'd said last year, showing him pictures of tandem jumps.

"Are you insane?" he'd replied, not even looking up from his phone. "That's way too dangerous. What if something went wrong?"

"But people do it all the time—"

"Mya, I'm not risking my life for some adrenaline rush. That's just stupid."

I'd brought it up again six months later, then again at Christmas. Each time, the same response: too dangerous, too risky, too stupid. He'd made me feel foolish for even wanting to try, as if my desire for adventure was somehow childish and irresponsible.

But here he was, planning a weekend bungee jumping trip with Angelina, his voice full of the enthusiasm he'd never shown for any of my suggestions.

"Okay, sounds perfect," he said, finally ending the call. He looked over at me with the satisfied expression of someone who'd just made exciting plans. "Angelina and I are going bungee jumping this weekend. There's this amazing bridge about two hours north."

I stared at him, my wedding ring sliding loose on my finger as my hands trembled slightly. "Bungee jumping."

"Yeah, she's been wanting to try it forever, and I figured why not? Life's short, right?"

"I've been asking you to go skydiving with me for two years," I said quietly.

His expression shifted, irritation flickering across his features. "That's completely different."

"How is it different?"

"Skydiving is way more dangerous than bungee jumping. The statistics—"

"Raylan, you told me all adventure sports were stupid risks. You made me feel ridiculous for even suggesting—"

"God, Mya, do you have to turn everything into a competition?" He stood up, running his hand through his hair in that gesture I knew meant he was getting defensive. "This is exactly what I'm talking about. You can't stand that I have a friendship with someone who shares my interests."

"Shares your interests? Since when do you bungee jump?"

"Since I decided to stop being boring and actually live a little." The words hit like a slap. "Maybe if you weren't so negative about everything, I'd want to do more things with you."

I felt something crack inside my chest, a hairline fracture that had been growing wider with each dismissal, each double standard, each moment when he chose her enthusiasm over my feelings.

"You're right," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. "I must be unreasonably jealous of a friendship."

He looked at me sharply, perhaps hearing something in my tone that made him uncomfortable. But instead of examining his own behavior, he doubled down.

"Exactly. And frankly, it's getting old."

I nodded slowly, my hand moving instinctively to my still-flat belly where our baby was growing. Our baby, who would grow up watching their father prioritize another woman's desires over their mother's feelings. Our baby, who would learn that love came with conditions and hierarchies.

"Have fun on your trip," I said, turning back to my pregnancy book.

But the words on the page blurred together as I realized I wasn't just losing my husband to another woman—I was losing myself to the smaller, quieter version of me that accepted crumbs while watching someone else feast at my table.