Chapter 1

Four years of dating and six years of marriage, Lucas Sterling and I had weathered every storm, never once parted.

I believed we were each other's number one.

That belief was shattered the day I overheard him at the hospital.

Lucas said, "You made me date Hannah Quinn and marry her just to pay back her family's kindness.

"It's not my fault her dad ended up disabled, and her mom walked out on her. Her dad volunteered. Hasn't ten years of her family leeching off us been enough?"

I had never even known about any supposed debt between our families.

So Lucas only came into my life and married me because my dad helped the Sterling family?

Inside the hospital room, Lucas's mother sounded resigned. She asked, "After ten years, don't you feel anything for Hannah at all?"

Lucas's voice dripped with disgust as he replied, "Who could ever love a crazy, vicious woman who even yells at kids?"

So that was how he really saw me: a crazy, vicious woman.

Sophia Lynch came over with her kid just to stir up trouble, and all I did was tell her to teach her daughter some decency, so she wouldn't grow up to be a mistress like her mom.

I didn't know that would make me the crazy, vicious woman.

But Sophia, knowing full well Lucas was married, still brought her kid over to our house to chase after him. So what did that make her?

Lucas's mother paused for a moment, then sighed. She said, "Hannah's father, William Quinn, saved your life and was paralyzed. Her mother couldn't bear it and ran off with another man.

"Hannah was only sixteen back then. She was isolated at school, bullied, and laughed at. You are aware of it all.

"If you really think this is none of your concern, and ten years is enough to pay it all back, then fine. Do whatever you want. I'm old now. I can't tell you what to do anymore.

"But let me say this: people need to learn to be grateful."

Lucas retorted, "There are tons of ways to pay them back: give them money, buy them a house, whatever. Why does it have to be my marriage? We grew up in completely different worlds and had totally different upbringings. We're just not compatible."

His mom stayed quiet for a long time before finally saying, "William nearly gave his life to save you. If we're going to pay them back, it should be with something that really matters.

"What William cared about most was Hannah. Of course, we have to take care of her. And the only way you can truly look after her is by being her husband."

Lucas shot back, "If this is what repaying a debt means, then I wish I'd just died back then. Spending my whole life with a woman I don't even love? That's worse than death."

I stumbled back, stunned. It turned out my dad ended up paralyzed because of Lucas.

All those years, Lucas had been patient with me, had showered me with affection, from every apology after every fight to every passionate moment I'd thought was real. Had it all been just because of my dad's sacrifice?

I clenched the medical report in my hand and slowly walked out of the hospital.

I had come to the hospital to check on Lucas's mom, but ended up fainting there.

The doctor gave me a check-up.

The results weren't good.

I used to think that if I died, Lucas would be left all alone in this world, and his world would fall apart. Turns out, I was just fooling myself.

It was raining outside.

I wandered aimlessly down the street, holding my umbrella.

The medical report slipped from my hand onto the wet pavement, dissolving instantly. The words blurred, as if the rain were erasing Death's summons.

But I knew that some things couldn't be undone.

By the time Lucas got home, the rain had stopped. I was sitting outside the front gate, lost in thought.

The car's headlights flashed in my face, blinding me. A sharp sting hit my eyes; I shut them reflexively.

Lucas stepped out of the car, his brows knitted as he walked over to me.

"Why are you sitting out here so late? Why aren't you inside yet?" he asked.

He looked down at me, his gaze impatient.

These days, we'd been fighting over Sophia, heading for divorce, stuck in a cold war.

This was the first time he'd spoken to me in two weeks.

I tilted my head up to meet his gaze. I asked, "Lucas, if I died, would you be happy?"

Lucas let out a cold, mocking laugh. He sneered, "Are you losing it again?"

In his eyes, every time I freaked out because I felt insecure, I was just losing it.

I used to wonder why we even got married, if love was really supposed to be the reason.

Even after ten whole years together, I still felt like he never truly loved me.

Turns out, he never loved me. Not even once.

I stared at his chiseled face, the same face that used to be just a blur in my memories.

It was Lucas who made me remember every detail, burning his features into my bones, branding them into my mind.

But now, it all just felt like a cruel joke.