Chapter 4
Michael opened his mouth, watching Anna disappear into the kitchen. Frustration and guilt flickered across his face.
He dragged his fingers through his hair and dropped heavily back into his chair.
Water ran in the kitchen, breaking the silence.
Anna stood at the sink, washing dishes on autopilot.
The cold water ran over her hands, pulling the warmth away, but it could not wash out the weight lodged in her chest.
Her eyes stung.
She blinked hard, pushing it back.
She could not cry. Not now.
There was nothing to cry about.
Crying would not fix anything anyway.
She was just so tired.
A bone-deep fatigue, the kind that seemed to seep out of every part of her.
For the past two weeks, Anna had been running on empty, driven past the point of exhaustion and never allowed to stop.
The pressure at work during the day had already pushed her to the edge, and when she got home, she had to face Margaret's critical gaze and her never-ending rules.
Michael's silence and withdrawal were like a dull blade, sawing away at her heart, one slow cut at a time.
She used to believe that she and Michael really loved each other.
They'd pictured their future together and worked side by side for that one goal.
She always thought their marriage was built on mutual understanding and support.
But now, she wasn't so sure anymore.
When it came to family expectations, she always seemed to be the one who had to compromise, the one who ended up sacrificing herself.
She asked herself bitterly if it was all because she was the wife, the daughter-in-law, the one who had married in and didn't share their blood.
The sound of running water filled the kitchen, the faucet left on.
Anna stared at her hands, submerged in the soapy water.
Her fingers had turned red from the cold water and detergent.
On the back of her hand, yesterday's burn from hot oil had puffed up into a red welt, throbbing with a dull ache whenever it was brushed.
"Anna, I'm off to work," Michael called out from the kitchen doorway.
Anna didn't turn around. She just replied softly, "Yeah."
Michael lingered in the doorway for a few seconds, as if he wanted to step inside, but in the end, he just turned and walked away.
Then came the sound of the front door opening and closing.
The house fell into complete silence.
Only the sound of running water and Anna's slightly labored breathing filled the space.
Anna turned off the faucet and carefully dried her hands with a towel, bit by bit.
She walked back to the living room and grabbed her coat and bag.
As she passed the mirror in the living room, she glanced at her reflection without thinking.
The woman in the mirror looked as pale as ever, with deep shadows under her eyes and lips drained of any color.
She was just twenty-eight, really.
But she looked well into her thirties, every bit of youth and brightness stripped away by the grind of daily life.
Anna tried to force a smile, but her face wouldn't respond.
And she stopped trying.
She grabbed her bag, slipped on her shoes, and walked out the door.
The hallway was dead quiet. The motion-sensor light came on with a dim yellow glow as the door clicked shut behind her.
She made her way down, one step at a time.
Her footsteps echoed through the empty hallway, slow and heavy.
When she reached the building's entrance, the crisp morning air hit her face, helping clear her head a bit.
She glanced up at the overcast sky.
The sun still hadn't shown itself. Just a sliver of pale light on the eastern horizon.
A new day had begun.
But to her, this day felt no different from the last couple of weeks.
She'd still be grinding away at work until late at night.
She'd still have to follow those family rules, getting woken up at six sharp every morning.
And she'd still be surrounded by that chilling silence and those icy stares.
She had no idea how long these days would drag on.
And she honestly didn't know how much longer she could last.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket.
She pulled it out and saw a message from her best friend and coworker, Sophie Hanson.
Sophie: [Anna, are you at the office yet? I got you coffee. Come quickly! And I've got some huge news. I can't keep it in. I have to tell you in person!]
Three over-the-top, wacky emojis followed.
Anna stared at the message, her cold fingertips hovering over the screen for a few seconds.
Then, she slowly typed out a reply.
Anna: [On my way.]
After sending it, she slipped her phone back into her pocket, took a deep breath of the cold air, and headed toward the subway station.
Her steps were a bit quicker than before.
The subway was like a massive steel serpent, gliding through the dark tunnels.
Anna leaned against the cold wall of the subway car, wearing her headphones, even though there was no music playing.
All she wanted was a barrier between herself and the chaos outside. The chatter, the driver's announcements, everything that made her feel even more exhausted.
Most of the passengers looked worn out. Some glued to their phones, others zoning out, their faces numb and expressionless.
Everyone was carrying their own weariness, their own mess of everyday chaos.
Anna stared at her blurry reflection in the subway window, her mind wandering to Sophie's text.
Good news?
Right now, what even counted as good news for her anymore?
A raise? A promotion?
She'd been fighting for a senior product manager spot for more than half a year, staying up late with her team night after night.
If she managed to land it, her paycheck would go up a lot, and they'd finally be a step closer to getting their own apartment in Riverside City.
But even if she did get promoted, then what?
More money would just mean even longer hours, even more overtime.
And when she got home, Margaret would just complain even more bitterly, "What's the point of making all that money if you never take care of the family?"
And Michael would just retreat into his usual silence, as if that was exactly how things should be.
Anna closed her eyes, feeling her temples start to throb again.
That wave of powerlessness crashed over her, so strong it almost swallowed her whole.
"Next stop, Riverside Station. Passengers, please exit to the rear."
The announcement snapped her out of her tangled thoughts.
Anna pushed her way out of the subway car with the crowd and hopped onto the escalator.
The chilly morning air hit her as she stepped out of the station, making her shiver, but at least it woke her up a bit.
No matter how messy things got at home, she couldn't afford to drop the ball at work.
That was her anchor, the only thing she could still hold onto.