Chapter 1

The day we held a celebration for my younger sister, my parents put me in charge of greeting guests at the door and taking their gifts.

My mom told me, "Your grades aren't good enough to get you into a decent college. You'll be awkward sitting in there, so go greet the guests."

My brother frowned. "Nina worked hard for this offer. Nothing can go wrong with her celebration.

"If anyone starts asking about your grades, you'll only bring down the mood."

My fiancé, Jack Jones, said flatly, "Zoe, this is a big day for Nina. Don't make a fuss."

I hugged my backpack a little tighter, swallowing the bitterness rising inside me.

Wasn't I already doing everything they wanted?

When I ranked first in my middle school, Nina was so devastated that she threatened to end her life.

My entire family accused me of deliberately showing off.

After that, I stopped letting myself stand out. I learned exactly how low I needed to keep my grades down.

For six years, I put up with their judgment and made sure I stayed at the bottom of the class. The SAT was my one chance to prove what I could really do.

As I watched them gather around Nina with happy smiles, the news that I had been accepted to the National Defense Institute caught in my throat.

Since they were so ashamed of me, there was no reason to tell them that I would be heading off to college in three days.

Seeing me standing there, Daniel came over and pushed me into the chair at the table. "Your grades may not be great, but you can still be useful.

"Greeting the guests isn't rocket science. Surely you can handle something that simple."

I looked up and saw the banner hanging above him. [Congratulations to Nina on her high school graduation. Wishing her a bright future.]

Daniel, who had spent years perfecting his calligraphy, had written it himself that morning. Every carefully written character carried his best wishes for Nina.

I really wanted to ask him if I got into the National Defense Institute, whether he would make a banner for me, too.

However, before I could open my mouth, Mom reminded me again. "Zoe, if anyone asks about your future plans later, tell them you got into college.

"Whatever you do, don't let it slip that you didn't even get into a community college."

She'd already drilled this into me at least ten times. She was terrified that I would embarrass her.

However, she seemed to forget something.

Back when Nina first came to live with us, the first thing she saw was my perfect score. She had hugged Mom and cried. "Zoe is incredible. Compared to her, I don't deserve to be part of this family."

That night, Nina cut her wrist.

Mom was the first person to blame me. "You knew Nina lost her parents. Why did you have to come in first and make her feel inadequate? Is your need to show off that strong?"

Right in front of Nina, she ripped my textbooks and all my certificates to shreds.

I was only twelve. I crouched down and slowly picked up the scraps scattered across the floor.

I wanted to cry, but I also understood why Mom felt so guilty toward Nina.

After all, Nina's parents died saving my parents.

From then on, for the sake of family peace, I learned to keep my grades low on purpose. I became the child they thought was the dumbest, the most carefree, and the least likely to amount to anything.

I squeezed my palm and replied softly, "Okay."

Dad nodded approvingly. "You may not be a top student, but we'll still do everything we can to support you. We'll spend whatever it takes to get you into a decent community college."

A sharp ache shot through my chest before I could stop it.

Nina had never been a particularly strong student.

Worried that she wouldn't get into a decent college here, my parents had already started planning for her to study abroad before the SAT.

Back then, they said, "A community college isn't good enough. No matter how bad Nina's grades are, she needs to have a bachelor's degree from a college overseas."

"No need. I've already been accepted—" I started to say.

"Mrs. Lane, before everyone arrives, let's take a group photo with Nina." Before I could finish, Jack interrupted me. "Zoe, take the picture for us."

His tone was commanding as he handed me the camera he always carried.

My parents stood protectively on either side of Nina. Jack and my brother, Daniel, stood behind her.

They all took their places without a word, and once again, there was no spot for me.

I swallowed against my dry throat and instinctively pressed the shutter.

As I handed the camera back to Jack, I asked in a low voice, "Can we take a photo together?"

The National Defense Institute had a strict military-style program, and it was 900 miles from his school. I wanted to keep a photo of him.

Jack froze for a second, then let out a mocking laugh. "Aren't you going to a community college in my city? We'll see each other all the time. Why bother with a photo?"

Nina had applied to a college in his city, too.

Whatever little hope I had left for him disappeared completely. My gaze fell on my backpack, and inside was my admission letter.

I'd wanted to share it with him first, but now, I was suddenly glad I hadn't told him anything.

*****

After the party, we headed home.

My mom gave 10 thousand dollars to Nina. "This is your college fund. You'll have plenty of expenses once school starts. If it's not enough, tell us."

My dad, grinning from ear to ear, handed Nina a bank card.

Nina hugged my mom affectionately. "You guys are so good to me. I'm so lucky to be your daughter."

Then she glanced at me and turned back to my mom. "Zoe got into college, too. Maybe I should share half my money with her."

My mom looked at Nina fondly. "This money is your reward for getting into college. You earned it with your hard work. Why would you give any to her?"

After saying that, she turned to me. "Zoe, don't be jealous of Nina. The truth is, you've behaved terribly these past few years.

"With your SAT results, throwing a party would only make people laugh at you."

She sighed. "Once we find a decent community college for you, you can work part-time while you study and learn to support yourself. Don't always expect us to take care of you."

Her tone was flat, with a hint of disdain.