Chapter 1
During the darkest year of my depression, I tried to end my life ten times, and every single time, Jed Sutton was the one who pulled me back.
With each rescue, Jed became the anchor of my world, the person I couldn't live without.
But on our one-year anniversary, Jed stood me up.
When I finally found him, his childhood sweetheart, Hazel Russell, was sitting right on his lap.
"I've already put the meds that'll make Laura's depression worse in your bag," Hazel said. "Just make sure she takes them, like before. If she gets better, I won't have anyone left for my psych thesis."
Jed ran his fingers through Hazel's long hair.
"Don't worry. I promised you. Once you graduate, I'll break up with Laura," he said.
So that was it. Jed had been using me as Hazel's personal lab rat all along.
I was completely broken inside and called my childhood friend, Melvin Davidson.
"Melvin, I made a mistake," I said, my voice trembling.
"Okay, I'll go to that treatment center abroad, just like you wanted. Can you come pick me up?"
*****
Melvin replied almost instantly. [I'll book a flight home right now. Just wait for me.]
His message made my eyes well up. I wiped away my tears and rushed home to get my visa paperwork together.
There was nothing left here for me to hold onto.
Jed didn't come home until three in the morning, shaking me awake, even though I could barely sleep on a good night.
He was frowning, smelling like a bar.
"Didn't I tell you to pick me up? And you just lazed around at home, sleeping?" Jed snapped at me.
Back then, Jed was my savior, my guiding light. I did whatever he asked, no questions asked.
Because I truly believed it was all for my own good.
But now, I finally saw things for what they really were.
I shook my head. "I didn't see your message."
Jed's temper flared. He grabbed my wrist, his eyes blazing with fury.
"You've really grown a spine, huh?" he spat. "You ignored my calls and texts. If Hazel hadn't come to get me, I'd have been left out in the cold, literally!"
I didn't make Jed a cup of honey water like I used to, fussing over him every time.
Instead, I met Jed's gaze, calm and steady. "Hazel's been with you since you were kids. If she's the one who brought you home, I really don't have anything to worry about."
He was visibly stunned.
Jed and I had fought about Hazel more times than I could count, but now, I found myself surprisingly at peace with Hazel bringing him home.
Jed took a deep breath and pulled himself together.
"Hazel got chewed out by her advisor today, so she was upset and wanted me to keep her company for a drink. Don't tell me you're gonna get mad about this, too," he said.
I laughed.
Jed fell silent, but out of the corner of his eye, he caught sight of my visa application papers on the desk.
His voice shot up an octave, and for a split second, a flicker of panic flashed in his eyes.
"You're leaving the country?" Jed blurted out.
Even he sounded shocked by that idea. "You don't even have the money for a visa. Don't kid yourself," he snapped.
I felt my own anger rising.
I jumped to my feet and yanked the papers out of Jed's grip.
"Give them back to me!" I snapped.
Jed's face was stormy as he threw the papers in my face.
"Laura, I suggest you get real. You live off me, eat my food. Without me, you wouldn't even know how to get by." With that, he slammed the door and left.
The sharp edge of the paper left a thin cut on my cheek, the sting prickling across my skin.
I silently tended to the wound and crawled into bed.