Chapter 4
The depth of their love made things really awkward for both Nathaly and me.
I swear, I truly didn't mean to intrude on their personal memories.
On the way back, Nathaly shared the story of Sebastian and Kara with me.
They were a couple from high school all the way through college, always glued together and never apart.
Everyone thought they were a match made in heaven.
But for most couples, the real test came after graduation, when they finally stepped into the real world.
As they got older, they started to realize how tough life could be, and eventually, they each went their own way to chase their dreams.
Kara decided to go abroad for further studies.
But the Burton family's business was all based here, and as the heir, there was no way Sebastian could follow her abroad.
For the first year, Sebastian was always flying back and forth.
But as their worlds grew further apart, seeing and experiencing different things, their perspectives started to clash.
They started fighting, and in the end, their love just couldn't survive the distance. It lost to time and space.
Nathaly told me, "No matter what, Sebastian and Kara are history. You're his wife now, and the present belongs to you. Don't get hung up on the past."
She also said, "As a woman, you just need to hold onto what really matters. For the rest, learn to turn a blind eye."
But what kept popping into my mind was that thick stack of plane tickets sitting on the shelf.
The latest date was just a week ago.
That was our wedding anniversary.
He told me he was on a business trip.
So, he wasn't really on a business trip. He'd actually flown out to see Kara.
Marriage was nothing like anything else. Pretending nothing was wrong was is just another way of burying my head in the sand, and all it did is let the other person push their limits even further.
While I kept lowering my standards, Sebastian was out there conquering new ground in my life.
When we got home, I confronted him about it, waiting for him to give me an explanation.
As soon as he realized I'd been to that house, his demeanor changed completely. His face turned stormy, and he snapped, "Don't go there again. That's not a place for you."
When Sebastian got angry, he radiated a dangerous energy.
That energy unsettled me.
It felt like the sky was falling.
It turned out that day was Kara's birthday, too.
After that, things got chilly between us.
Back then, we'd just hit our one-year anniversary.
I sat alone in the living room, with only a single lamp on. In the dim glow, the steady ticking of the clock filled the silence.
The music echoed through the room, melancholic, hopeless, and full of sorrow.
"Have I found you
"Flightless bird.
"Grounded bleeding.
"Or lost you.
The song was painfully fitting.
Just like this empty villa, it felt like a cage keeping me prisoner.
With a life like this, it felt like I could see exactly where it was all headed.
For years, I felt like I was buried in the graveyard of our marriage, watching Sebastian cling to memories of the past while his eyes wandered toward the vibrant world outside.
He never once looked at me.
We each nursed our own burdens, letting our days sink into a lifeless routine.
Why should I settle for this?
I wanted to climb out of this grave and see what the world outside looked like.
That idea had haunted me for a long, long time.
Back then, Sebastian and I had just started giving each other the cold shoulder because of Kara.
Barbara had no clue about our situation and kept calling every day, pushing us to have a baby.
I got so sick of her constant nagging that I ended up turning to Sebastian.
When it came to making a baby, if he wasn't willing, there was absolutely nothing I could do.
I wanted to try one last time. We were married, after all. Life had to keep moving, right?
Sebastian was busy with work. After I finished talking, he kept typing on his computer and replied, "Alright. When's your ovulation date?"
In that moment, it felt like I'd been slapped right across the face.
Humiliation flooded me, sharp and overwhelming.
I couldn't believe how calmly he said it.
It was as if I wasn't even a person—just an animal meant for breeding, and my only purpose was to produce the next generation.
I must've been standing there in silence for ages, because Sebastian finally turned to look at me and said, "Anything else?"
I spun around and almost ran out of the room.
An inexplicable fear swept over me.
This life was scary as hell.
That was the first time I ever brought up divorce to Sebastian.
He just checked his watch, barely looking at me. "I'm busy. I've got a meeting this afternoon. Estrella, I thought you knew better.
"Don't bring up that kind of nonsense again. You know our marriage isn't just some simple relationship."
He slid a card across the table to me. "Here. Buy whatever you want. Just don't bring this up again, alright?"