Chapter 3

By the time dinner was over, Yvonne could barely keep her eyes open. Their friends and coworkers didn't feel comfortable letting them head home like that, so they insisted the two stay over.

Silas waved down a staff member and helped Yvonne back to their room. After they washed up, he switched off the main lights, leaving only the bedside lamp glowing softly.

Before long, Yvonne stirred awake, reaching out to pull him into her arms. She mumbled, "Howard, you came back for me, didn't you?"

Silas froze, not correcting her mistake. After a long pause, he finally managed to ask. "And you? Who were you drinking for tonight?"

"You, Howard. It could only ever be you. Don't you get it?"

Even though he'd expected this, hearing it out loud still felt like a punch to the gut.

Only now did Silas realize why Yvonne always acted like she couldn't handle her liquor around him. She was terrified that if she got drunk, her true feelings would spill out, just like tonight. She wanted to keep him in the dark forever.

His hands clenched into fists, and he struggled to breathe. Finally, he managed to pull away from her embrace.

He sat in the bathroom for two hours, trying to get his emotions under control. When he finally stepped out, he found the bed empty and Yvonne was nowhere to be seen.

Silas opened the bedroom door and saw the motion-activated light glowing on the balcony. He slipped over without a sound. Peering through the window, he spotted Yvonne and Howard standing together outside.

The night concealed Yvonne's expression, but her voice came through, thick with suppressed emotion. "You told me yesterday you weren't going back to Parielle. Why did you change your mind?"

"And you? Why did you marry Silas and not tell me?" Howard replied, his tone calm but sharp.

Hearing Howard's steady voice, Yvonne felt her anger flare up even more. Whatever self-control she had left crumbled in an instant, and she clutched his hand hard.

"You should know better than anyone why I married him. He looks so much like you, and he was your underclassman. Being with him was the only way I could see you openly, instead of sneaking around like before.

"I flew all the way to Parielle, and waited downstairs for hours, just to catch a glimpse of you."

Silas suddenly realized that Yvonne had gone to Parielle for Howard and that was why she had ignored all his calls. A sharp pain stabbed through his chest. His nails bit deep into his palms.

Howard was genuinely caught off guard by her confession. He said under his breath, "You're crazy."

"I am crazy. Ever since the day you insisted we break up, I've lost it. Don't you see? I just wanted you with me. Even a stand-in was enough for me to hold onto for the rest of my life."

The heartbreak in her voice left Howard frozen in place, unable to say a word.

After a long stretch of silence, Howard finally forced out the words, his voice raw with pain. "Yvonne, what is Silas to you? You've been married for three years. You're even having his kid. Did you ever care about him, even a little?"

Yvonne suddenly laughed, almost mockingly, "Howard, he's nothing but a substitute for you. How could I ever fall for him? Even if I did, it's only because he looks so much like you. Every time I see his face, you're all I think about.

"My baby is almost here. I've already picked out a name. Howard Swanson. Your name and mine, always together."

A cold dread washed over Silas; tears were streaming down his face.

He repeated that name in his mind. He shut his eyes as memories crashed over him—how she used to cling to him in bed after their wedding, never seeming satisfied, and how anxious she'd become after getting pregnant.

He bit down hard on his lip, swallowing back the cries of despair threatening to break free.

Every last ounce of strength drained from his body; he braced himself against the wall and staggered sway, barely able to keep himself upright.

Their voices faded into the background, and just as the bedroom door was about to close behind him, Silas caught Howard's voice. "Aren't you afraid Silas will find out the truth?"

Yvonne's reply was icy and sure. "He'll never know. And even if he does, he'd never walk away since he loves me so much."

Hearing Yvonne's words, Silas flashed a bitter, pained smile.

Yvonne was wrong. Silas would break out of the cage she'd built for him with his own hands, and fly free—never looking back.

Yvonne didn't come back at all that night.

As soon as the sun came up, Silas was already awake. He slipped out without disturbing anyone, went home alone, grabbed his documents, and went to get his immigration sorted out himself.

Right after he finished, Silas got a call from Howard. "Silas, can you come with me to the cemetery today? I want to pay my respects to your dad."

Silas's mom had passed away early, so he rarely saw his relatives on his mother's side. Even though he and Howard were only three years apart, they'd never really been close.

But Howard wanted to visit Silas's parents' graves. Silas couldn't refuse him.