Chapter 3
Ewan set down the tray, and on it was the roast beef, the dish I used to love.
But as soon as I saw the meat, I instinctively started retching.
That day, I watched as my insides spilled out, blood pouring everywhere.
Ever since then, I couldn't eat meat anymore.
Ewan suddenly flew into a rage.
He clamped my jaw and shoved the roast beef into my mouth.
"Cut the act, Melody! Are you starving yourself just to make me feel guilty?" he yelled.
"Don't act like I owe you anything!" he said.
He tried to make me swallow, but my throat refused to cooperate.
He shoved me aside, and the meat just spilled out of my mouth.
He smashed the tray down in anger, and sticky grease spilled all over the floor.
"Not gonna eat? Fine! I'll get someone to slap even more talismans on it!" he yelled.
He was hysterical, his eyes blazing red with rage.
My child was my only weakness.
Desperate, I scrambled to pick up the greasy meat from the floor and shoved it into my mouth, piece after piece, not caring about anything else.
Even when I was retching nonstop, I forced myself to keep going.
Ewan crouched down, roughly scrabbling at my hands to stop me.
"Stop it!" he barked.
I kept forcing the meat into my mouth, ignoring him.
"I said that's enough!" he snapped.
He slapped the meat out of my hand and sent it skidding across the floor with a kick.
Finally, he stormed out, slamming the door behind him. I spent the whole night alone in that room.
Wasn't I doing exactly what he wanted? Then why did he get so mad?
He really hated me.
I only had to kneel for three days before Ewan finally gave the list back to me.
He told me, "This body of yours is meant for Sloan’s healing. You can't let anything happen to it."
Every day, they brought in handfuls of pills, and someone would always come by to check my heart readings.
They kept saying my heart was perfectly healthy, beating strong.
That day, Ewan was there too, fussing over Sloan like she was the only thing that mattered.
Suddenly, a thought popped into my head.
I said, "Ewan, why don't you just take my heart and give it to Sloan?"
Truth was, I didn't want Sloan to survive, not even a little.
But with Ewan right there, I just had to say it, just to spite him.
His hand, holding the pen, suddenly stopped in the middle of writing.
"Melody, I'm not as cruel as you," Ewan said, his voice icy.
He glared at me, his eyes full of hatred.
Even now, he still believed I killed Lacey.
Forget it. None of this mattered anymore.
I forced a smile and swallowed the pills like a good girl.
Only I knew that those pills were really my curse, counting down to my end.
The pain from the cancer kept getting worse, but at least it mostly hit at night.
Eating became almost impossible for me.
Ewan wouldn't let me eat at the same table as Sloan.
He didn't even realize.
The clinic where I had my checkup called, asking me to come back for a follow-up.
I sent their number straight to my block list.
I was barely hanging on anyway. What difference did it make if I lasted a day or a month?
Ewan dragged my parents in.
The first thing out of their mouths was that I deserved everything that happened to me.
Then, without missing a beat, they turned to Sloan and started apologizing.
They said I might as well just drop dead.
They said they would never have a daughter as cruel as me.
I stood on the stairs, watching them cling to Sloan, all affectionate, like she was their real daughter.
Then they started tearing into me, not holding back at all.
It really felt like Sloan was their true daughter, and I was nothing to them.
I kept telling myself it didn't matter. They'd never loved me, not once.
It was not like this was anything new; their hearts had never been mine.
If they really cared, would they have auctioned off my first night just to bail the Richardson family out when they went broke?
But before I turned seventeen, there were so many nights with Mom around, and everything felt so safe and loved.
Why did their love just vanish overnight?
Just like Ewan, one day, he just stopped loving me, too.
My mom walked over, her tone dripping with contempt.
"We've decided to make Sloan our daughter now. As if this could atone for your sins," she spat.
I clenched my fists so tight my nails dug deep into my palms.
"Okay," I forced out, barely above a whisper.
She snapped her head up, clearly not expecting me to agree so quickly.
"So, what do you need me to do?" I asked calmly.
She sighed.
"We really have no choice. After everything you've done, if we don't cut you off, the Richardson family will be ruined," she said.
"Just find some time to come with us and sign the paperwork to officially end our parent-child relationship," she added.
I nodded.
I bit my lip so hard it hurt, but I still couldn't stop the tears from falling.
"Anything else? If not, I'm heading upstairs," I said.
My mom shot me a look.
"Stop giving Ewan a hard time. He's already done all he can for you," she said.
Then she turned away, pulling Sloan into a protective hug, her face full of concern for her.
But deep down, what I really wanted to say was, "Mom, I just wish you'd hug me too."
Ewan left with them, but before heading out, he came upstairs to see me.
"Let's get divorced," I said.
He tried to speak, but I stopped him.
After a pause, he said, "Okay."
He agreed right away.
He'd probably been holding onto those words for a long time.