Chapter 1
On the day Anna's middle school placement came through, she suddenly grabbed my hand and said, "Mom, I want to stay with Grandma."
I asked why, and she lowered her head, whispering, "There's more freedom at Grandma's place."
I didn't cry, didn't make a scene, and didn't ask what she meant by 'freedom.'
I just nodded calmly, packed her suitcase myself, and took her to my ex-husband's house, where his new wife was waiting.
As she walked in, she glanced back at me, her eyes almost triumphant.
Three months later, she called, sobbing so hard she could barely catch her breath. "Mom, when are you coming to pick me up?"
I stayed silent for a long time before saying something that completely broke her.
*****
On the day the middle school acceptance list came out, Anna Thompson put her report card on the dining table.
I glanced at it.
She'd made it into the gifted class at the best middle school in the district.
She'd gotten in.
I brought out the pork rib soup and said, "Let's add another dish tonight."
Anna didn't touch her food.
She kept her head down, fiddling with the cuff of her school uniform, her voice barely above a whisper.
"Mom, I want to talk to you about something," she said.
I set the bowl of soup in front of her.
"Go ahead," I said.
She looked up at me, then quickly looked down again.
"I want to stay with Grandma," Anna said.
The kitchen hood was still humming.
The living room clock ticked over to six-thirty.
I didn't say anything right away.
Anna, afraid I'd get upset, hurried to add something.
"It's not that I don't like you," Anna said.
"I just feel like I have more freedom at Grandma's," Anna said softly.
I sat down across from her.
"What do you mean by 'freedom'?" I asked.
She bit her lip.
"It means I don't have to wake up at six-thirty every morning to memorize English vocabulary.
"I don't have to go over and correct all my mistakes after finishing my homework.
"I don't have to take math Olympiad and reading classes on weekends.
"I don't have to only get twenty minutes on my phone each day.
"Grandma said since I got into a good school, I should take it easy," she added.
Her voice grew a little louder at the end.
It was like she'd finally gotten something off her chest.
I looked at her.
She was just thirteen, her features already mature, but her tone was still that of a kid.
She thought freedom was just having no boundaries.
She figured all my rules were just me trying to make things difficult for her.
For years, I'd wake up at six every morning to fix her breakfast.
While she studied English vocabulary, I'd be right there, slicing up fruit for her.
When she was correcting her mistakes, I'd sit on the couch, double-checking her answers.
When she had competitions, I'd take time off work to go with her, even if it meant traveling to another district.
Her dad, James Thompson, only called once a month.
And every time, it was always the same few lines.
James would say, "Anna, don't push yourself too hard.
"Your mom's just too uptight.
"Come stay with me, and I'll take you out for some good food."
Her grandma, Grace Alden, was even more blunt.
Every time we video chatted, she'd say, "Why does a girl need to study so much?
"Look how skinny she is. As her mother, you're being far too harsh.
"Come live with Grandma. I'll get you fried chicken and iced latte, and you can sleep in as late as you want."
Every time Anna heard that, she'd sneak a look at me.
She used to speak up for me.
"Mom's just doing it for my own good," she'd say.
But after a while, she stopped.
She started putting her phone face down on the table.
She started rolling her eyes every time I asked about her homework.
She'd slam her door whenever I told her to go to bed.
I noticed every bit of it.
And I let it slide.
Because I knew she was at that awkward stage, caught between being a kid and growing up.
She wanted to make her own choices.
I couldn't protect her from every storm for the rest of her life.
But I couldn't let her believe that a few sweet words from others were all that mattered.
Anna saw me stay quiet, and her eyes grew red.
"Mom, are you going to say I'm being immature again?" she asked.
"Are you going to say I'll regret this later?" Anna pressed.
I picked up my fork and put a piece of pork rib in her bowl.
"No," I said.
She froze.
I said, "If you've really decided, I'll let you."
Anna's eyes suddenly lit up.
But it wasn't out of gratitude or anything.
It was the look of victory.
She couldn't help herself.
"Really?" she asked.
"Yes," I said.
"So when can I go?" she asked.
"This Friday," I replied.
She couldn't help but smile.
"See, Grandma was right, you just can't bear to let me go," Anna teased.
I didn't respond to that.
I just asked, "Do your dad and grandma know?"
She nodded right away.
"Yes," she replied.
"Dad said my room's all ready for me," Anna said.
"And Mary said she's happy to have me," Anna added.
Her new stepmom.
She meant James's new wife, Mary Thalmer.
James and I had been divorced for four years.
Back then, he came home with shopping receipts from trips with Mary, and there was a scent on his shirt collar that definitely wasn't mine.
I didn't make a scene.
I laid out every receipt, photo, and hotel record right there on the table.
He got down on his knees and begged me.
All I asked for was the house, half the money, and custody of Anna.
Back then, Anna was nine. She clung to my waist, crying her heart out, saying she'd only be with me.
Four years had passed, and she'd forgotten all about that day.
She'd also forgotten how many parent-teacher meetings James missed each year.
I didn't remind her.