Chapter 1

Alex Carter and I had been purely friends for twenty-six years.

Men and women were different, after all. Plus, he was the kind of restless soul who could never sleep alone.

So every time he started dating someone, I'd cut him off.

On my twenty-seventh birthday, Alex, probably worn down by his family's pressure to settle down, showed up at my door early in the morning.

Alex said, "Emma, how about we just make do with each other?"

I was about to curse him out.

"I'm serious," he said.

For the first time ever, Alex broke the rules and offered his hand to me.

I stared at him, taking a few seconds to think.

"Alex, if we get together and then break up, I won't be your friend anymore," I said.

He flashed me a playful grin.

"No way we're breaking up. I could never let you go," Alex said.

So I took his hand.

That making do lasted three years.

At the engagement party, Alex and his buddy, Ryan Jennings, were out on the balcony, sneaking a smoke.

Ryan asked, "Alex, back then, you were worried your dad might mess with Caroline, so you asked Emma to run interference for her. But honestly, Emma looks like she's genuinely into you now.

"You didn't, like, forget to tell Emma this was all just pretend, did you?"

*****

The hazy smoke blurred Alex's face. He said, his voice detached and calm, "I was too caught up in the moment that day. I forgot."

I stopped dead at the corner.

I still clutched the cold medicine I had brought for Alex.

Ryan practically yelled, calling Alex a bastard.

Then he leaned in closer, eager to know more.

Ryan asked, "So, what's the deal with you and Emma now? Is this a real marriage or just for show?

"I saw Caroline post on her story yesterday; you were at her place in the middle of the night before your engagement, hanging out in a bathrobe, cooking up a midnight snack."

Alex chuckled.

He replied, "Caroline's my girlfriend, obviously.

"Emma? She's my partner for the family arrangement. What's the difference if it's real or fake?

"I've known she likes me for ages. I'm giving her a happy marriage and some status; it's not like she's getting a bad deal."

The glass in my hand was so hot it hurt my palm.

I nervously lowered my head and noticed the medicine I brought for Alex had already melted in my hand.

What burned even more fiercely was my face—the sheer humiliation of having my secret crush exposed and then dragged out for everyone to mock.

Alex said, "You know, Emma's actually pretty naive. I've been playing the dating game for years; who gets all breathless and can't even meet their partner's eyes from holding hands during an arranged marriage?

"She always pretends she doesn't care about me, acting all cool, but honestly, she's crazy patient and always indulges me.

Alex let out a couple of soft coughs, boasting a little. "Two days before the engagement, I lied and said I had to leave for an urgent trip. She didn't suspect a thing and helped me pack.

"Last night, Caroline and I were messing around by the window and got a bit wild. When I came home in the middle of the night with a headache, all the medicine had expired.

"Emma went out in her pajamas and a down jacket to buy medicine, then made soup and coaxed me to take it before letting me sleep.

"Seems like every half hour she'd get up to check my forehead, worried I might be running a fever.

"She has no idea how much she actually likes me."

Ryan made a jealous noise.

"Come on, Alex, Emma's been so good to you all these years. Don't tell me you never caught feelings for her?" Ryan asked.

I stood outside the door.

I felt like a joke. My eyes stung with tears I couldn't hold back.

But I still couldn't bring myself to leave. I had to hear what Alex would say.

Alex didn't hesitate for a second. He replied, his tone mocking, "Seriously? That's a stupid question. Of course, I don't like her.

"Emma and I have known each other for thirty years. If we were ever gonna hook up, it would've happened way before I turned twenty-seven.

"I go for girls who are wild but pure, the ones with that unexpected contrast. Emma's the cool and aloof type, totally not my thing.

"Love's all about that instant spark. I'm not into that slow-burn stuff. Even if thirty more years pass, I still wouldn't catch feelings for her.

He took another deep breath, speaking with absolute confidence. "Emma's my friend for life, and she'll always be part of my family. Even if I don't love her, I'd still make sure she's taken care of.

"I'm keeping both Emma and Caroline."

My heart twisted in pain.

But I couldn't help but let out a bitter laugh.

Did Alex really see me as nothing more than a plaything? Someone he could toy with, pick up when he wanted, and toss aside when he didn't?

How utterly pathetic must I have seemed for him to view marrying me as some kind of act of grace?

Up on the rooftop, Ryan let out a sigh and gave Alex a pat on the shoulder.

"Come on, Alex, the party's about to start," Ryan said. "Tonight, Caroline's supposed to play my cousin, right?"

I turned away and headed downstairs before they did.

I rushed into the bathroom, couldn't stop myself from dry heaving.

Tears fell faster than I could wipe them away, smudging my carefully done makeup.

All those years of feelings flooded over me like a filthy swamp, drowning me in an instant, leaving me choking and sick to my stomach.

The group chat was blowing up with notifications.

[It's the wedding party. Where are our main characters?]

[Alex and I will be there soon. My cousin's coming tonight, too.]

[When did you suddenly get a cousin? And Emma? Haven't heard a peep from her.]

I found an empty room.

I washed my face and redid my makeup, keeping it light and natural.

Over the years, every time Alex got into a new relationship, I'd deliberately cut off all contact with him.

I wanted to see what kind of woman could win Alex's heart.

As for Alex and me...

I dabbed away the tears at the corners of my eyes with a cotton swab, making sure not to mess up my makeup.

Alex probably thought I was kidding around that day we got together when I said that if we broke up, we wouldn't stay friends.

But me, Emma, I always had plenty of friends.

And I was done wasting time on someone who didn't love me.