Chapter 5
I was sorting medicine in the supply area one day when I cut my finger on broken glass.
James came by for a resupply, saw it, and took my hand to look without thinking twice. "Still clumsy. Here, let me."
His ability spread over my hand, warm as a towel out of the dryer. The cut closed while I watched.
"Were you this reckless before the apocalypse?" He was smiling while he worked. "Senior year you cut your hand slicing an apple, and your mom chased you around the living room."
That got a laugh out of me. "You remember everything."
"Of course," he said it seriously. "Everything about you."
My smile paused for a moment.
I knew what he meant. He'd told me how he felt before the apocalypse, and I turned him down, because there was nobody in my head back then, and he felt like an older brother.
Now, I cared about Evan.
Even though I knew by then that the man found me annoying.
"James..."
"Yes?"
I was about to say something when a hand closed around my wrist.
The grip was hard.
Evan had come in without a sound. He crossed the room, pulled my hand out of James', and folded it into his own.
"There's movement on the perimeter," he said.
I blinked. "So you want me out there to scout it?"
Evan didn't answer.
He held my wrist and walked me out of the supply area.
James called after us. "That cut's fresh, keep it dry!"
Evan's stride broke for a second, but he didn't turn around.
He didn't stop until we hit the corner of the hallway.
I looked around. "There's no movement here."
Evan stayed silent.
I looked down at my wrist, still in his hand.
"Evan, you can let go."
He let go.
His fingers opened one at a time.
In that half second, I caught a fragment.
'Useless.'
My chest dropped.
Why was it useless again?
I turned it over. The trip out here may have been a waste. Maybe dragging me down the hall was pointless. Maybe he thought I'd be no good on the scout.
None of that fit. There was no movement on the perimeter. He'd made it up to get me out of that room.
So what did useless mean?
I watched him go. His steps were long and fast, like a man running from something.
I let out a breath.
I didn't understand him.
I didn't understand him at all.
Everyone else's thoughts came through whole.
He came in words alone.
Two or three of them, with no context, no tone, and nothing on either side.
They came like a letter torn to pieces, and all I could do was pick up the scraps and put them together myself.
Every time I put them together, I got the same picture.
He found me annoying. He didn't need me. He was settling a debt.
I only understood much later that my ability wasn't catching half of him. Evan had crushed the words himself before they ever reached me.
The beast horde was here.
It was the biggest one of the third year. The northern line was about to break. One Elite-Class mutant beast and three Advanced-Class beasts hit at the same time, and Haven's alarm went up.
"Stay here," Ethan said before he left.
He had on that black combat suit with the collar zipped to his throat.
"I'm coming with you. My ability leveled up and I can hear a mile out now."
Something moved across his face for a fraction of a second, and I'd have missed it if I hadn't spent two years watching him.
He nodded. "Stay in the last support vehicle. Don't get out."
"Okay."
I wasn't just sitting around in the support vehicle. My ability was the best intelligence net the rear had, so I closed my eyes and pushed my range as wide as it would go.
"Somebody on West Second with a broken leg, thinking 'help.' Team Two, go get him.
"Sentry at North Watchtower Four is thinking 'we're out of ammo.' Supply team, head north.
"East side, a survivor is working out how to lift supplies in the confusion. Team Three, eyes open.
"Team One, position six. A man took a poisoned spike in the left leg and he's thinking 'I can't hold on, I can't fall behind.' Medic to Team One, position six."
My ability was more accurate, quicker, and reached farther than ever before.
I called them out one at a time, and we pulled people through the same way.
The fight ran for four hours.
When it ended, the Haven had lost two people, and seventeen were hurt.
That was half of what we'd expected to lose.
It was all because of me.
My ability burned out on the way back, and someone lifted me while I was fading.
The smell of blood came at me, and my face pulled tight, and then something gentle touched my forehead, and I thought I heard a voice.
"Don't be scared. It's me."
At the debrief the next day, the aide stood up. "We kept losses down, mostly on the intel from the rear. Claire's range has widened a lot. She swept the outer edge. I doubt an Elite-Class could hide from her now."
His words hit him, and he paused.
The room went silent for a second.
Evan sat at the head of the table.
He looked up.
Then he looked at me.
For the first time, I couldn't read his face, and it was more tangled than anything I'd seen on him.
"You can hear Elite-Class now." His voice was flat.
There was no reason to deny it.
"Yes. My range and my reach both went up after the upgrade, and I can switch it on and off now."
I kept it plain, like a work report.
But Evan's expression shifted, just barely.
His jaw tightened.
After the meeting, everyone left.
Evan didn't move.
I didn't leave either.
The command room held the two of us.
He sat in his chair looking at the table.
"How long has it been?"
I knew what he meant.
"Two or three months."
Evan didn't answer.
He sat there in silence for a long time.
Then he stood up and left.
He passed me on the way, and I caught a fragment.
'It's over.'
I stood there, frozen.
It was over?
What was it?
What was he afraid of?
He was afraid I'd find out how much he couldn't stand me. Before, when I couldn't hear him, he could keep up the act. Now that I heard everything, he didn't even have to bother.
'It's over.'
Right. There was no act left.
I took a breath and walked out of the meeting room.