Chapter 4

Maybe they still loved me, deep down.

I just didn't get it.

I just didn't understand the way they expressed love.

Looking back now, I found my thoughts ridiculous.

I realized I was nothing more than a walking wallet, a bottomless cash machine, always ready to pay out.

My phone lit up again.

This time, it was a message from a distant relative back home.

[Emily, I heard your dad's blood pressure is giving him trouble?]

[Your parents are getting up there in age. As their daughter, you really should be more caring.]

[You ought to be more thoughtful toward them.]

[Don't let something so trivial cause a rift in the family.]

I looked at each sentence.

I felt nothing inside, totally unfazed.

All this so-called "concern" was just another guilt trip.

I'd been hearing it for ten years.

It didn't affect me anymore.

I didn't reply.

Instead, I quietly set this distant relative's messages to Do Not Disturb.

I knew this was only the first wave.

Next, more and more people would start appearing.

They would appear in my life in various ways, trying once again to pull me back into that abyss.

I was not getting fooled again.

I was not the Emily I used to be.

I turned off my phone and opened my laptop.

I dove into my work, focusing on the tasks in front of me.

Tomorrow, I had an important proposal to present.

I needed to make sure nothing could possibly go wrong.

Work was the only thing I truly had control over.

Work was the only thing I could count on to give me a sense of security.

Tomorrow was a brand new start, time to say goodbye to the past for good.

I made up my mind.

From now on, I was living for myself, no more for anyone else.

I was done sacrificing for others. From here on out, it was all about me, for the people who actually love me, and for those who genuinely care about me.

It was late.

The city's hustle and bustle slowly faded into silence.

My heart was calmer than ever before.

I set my work aside.

I walked over to the big window.

The city lights sparkled below.

They glittered against the night, bright and alive, just like my heart right now, shining with new hope.

I was filled with dreams for the future and determined never to look back.

My eyes were filled with unwavering resolve.

This time, I truly let it all go.

All the drama, entanglements, resentment, frustration, grievances, and moments I felt wronged—all faded away with those words: "just water poured out."

I took a deep breath.

I could finally breathe easy, like my lungs were full of fresh air.

It wasn't like the old days anymore.

That suffocating heaviness was gone.

I went to bed and lay down.

I closed my eyes.

Tomorrow, I'll greet the day with a whole new outlook, ready to embrace my new life.

Early the next morning, my phone started ringing again.

I glanced at the screen.

It was a number I didn't recognize.

The area code was from back home.

I let it ring.

I knew it had to be Mom, Dad, or Jason, using someone else's number to try and get through to me.

They just weren't going to give up that easily.

Sure enough, it wasn't long before my WhatsApp started receiving a bunch of friend requests, all from relatives.

Each message was worded with concern and comfort.

[Emily, it's your aunt.]

[Your mom said you haven't picked up your phone these past couple of days. Is everything okay?]

[We're family. Can't we just sit down and talk?]

[Your parents worked so hard to raise you. Don't make things so difficult for them.]

[Your brother's only looking out for you, you know.]

I didn't accept a single one.

I just flat-out ignored them.

Back then, I probably would've caved by now.

Because I was scared.

I used to be terrified they'd call me a bad daughter.

I used to dread everyone pointing fingers at me.

But currently I was not scared anymore.

I truly understood that I could bear some names and accusations, and if some bonds were severed, so be it.

I finished my breakfast.

Just like any other day, I headed out for work.

On the way, I made myself a cup of coffee.

After a few sips, I felt refreshed and ready to take on the day.

I walked into the office.

Everyone in the office was hustling.

I got lost in my work.

At least for a little while, I managed to forget all the drama back home.

But then...

By the afternoon, reality came knocking again.

I just got a text.

Turns out, it was from Jason.

He texted me from a new number.

Jason: [Emily, are you really going to fall out with Mom and Dad?]

[We need cash urgently right now.]

[Dad's seriously not feeling well.]

[If you wire the money, I'll say sorry.]

[We're family, can't we stop tearing each other apart?]

Jason's tone had changed.

Gone was the accusatory tone from earlier.

Now, he sounded like he was pleading.

He even sounded a little hurt, like he'd been wronged.

I curled my lips into a cold smirk.

Nice acting.

Would he really apologize?

Even if he does apologize, so what?

What I really want wasn't just some empty apology from him.

What I really wanted was to be seen as my own person and shown some respect.