Chapter 1
Everyone knew I liked Ethan Gordon, but he somehow never seemed to notice it.
That day, I went to see him again. Before I walked in, I heard him bragging to his buddies, "Agnes has been chasing after me for three years. Even if I hit her, she wouldn't leave."
I froze outside the door, my eyes stinging with tears. And then, out of nowhere, lines of comments popped up before my eyes.
[There he goes again, talking big. Try laying a hand on Agnes and see what happens. His buddies would beat the hell out of him.]
[Agnes, seriously, wake up. Take a look at Ethan's friends. Every single one of them is better than him.]
[Exactly, especially that rich guy with glasses, Jesse Summers. You talked to him last month, and he was so happy that he couldn't sleep for three days.]
I wasn't sure whether to believe it, so I sent Jesse a text. [You there?]
A low voice came from right behind me, barely holding back the excitement. "Yeah."
*****
I stood outside Ethan's door, and the avocado salad I was holding felt a bit heavy.
He'd mentioned it last month while gaming. "That restaurant across town supposedly has really good avocado salad."
I remembered what he said, went way out of my way today to grab it, crossing half the city so it'd still be fresh when I got here.
I paused while I was about to press the doorbell. It was too loud inside.
The game sounds mixed with loud laughter, beer cans clanking, and Ethan shouting over everyone. "Agnes? She's been chasing me for three years. I could slap her across the face, and she'd still ask if she did something wrong. You believe that?"
I was frozen right outside the door.
The bag handle pressed deep into my palm, the plastic edges digging in and hurting.
"No way, Ethan. For real?" someone jeered.
"Yeah," Ethan said.
I knew that smug tone in Ethan's voice way too well.
He continued, "Last week, I said I wanted tacos, and she got up at five a.m. to buy them and bring them to me. I told her they were sour and didn't take them. She actually apologized and promised she'd get there earlier next time."
The laughter exploded.
My eyes started to sting, and my nose was getting all stuffed up.
I spent three years staying up late gaming with him, helping him with his studies, and skipping class to take care of him when he was sick. And to him, it was me being pathetic, another story to brag about with his buddies.
Right then, something weird happened. A few faint lines of text suddenly popped up in front of my eyes, like livestream comments.
[There he goes again, talking big. Try laying a hand on Agnes and see what happens. His buddies would beat the hell out of him.]
[Agnes, seriously, wake up. Take a look at Ethan's friends. Every single one of them is better than him.]
[Exactly, especially that rich guy with glasses, Jesse Summers. You talked to him last month, and he was riding that high for three whole days.]
I was completely dazed.
Was I so angry that I was having illusions?
I blinked a few times, but the words didn't disappear. Another comment floated by.
[Turn around. Stairwell corner. Jesse is watching. No, not watching. He's openly worrying about you.]
I turned around fast. Someone really was standing in the shadow by the stairwell.
It was Jesse, Ethan's roommate. The quiet guy who always sat in the corner reading.
He wore thin glasses, had soft skin, and whenever he looked at someone, his eyes would dart away for a second.
While Ethan and the guys got loud, he'd sit at his computer coding or keep his earbuds in.
Right now, he was clutching a stack of books, and he looked like he was about to leave. The moment our eyes met, he tensed up so suddenly that the books almost slipped.
The live comments kept popping up.
[His phone screen is still on. Bet it's Agnes's messages.]
[Send him a message. See if he's online.]
Almost without thinking, I pulled out my phone.
I'd added Jesse on WhatsApp last year for a group project, but we hadn't messaged each other since.
I shot him a quick text: [You there?]
Right then, I heard a soft thud behind me.
Jesse had dropped his phone.
He scrambled to grab it, his ears turning red, the flush spreading all the way down his neck.
He locked his eyes on the screen, finger frozen above it, like he didn't know how to answer.
Then, in a quiet voice that shook a little, he said, "Yeah."
The live comments went wild.
[He replied. He said yeah.]
[Oh my, his voice is so sexy.]
It hit me all at once.
Jesse hurried over, then suddenly stopped about several steps away, like a kid who thought he was in trouble.
He glanced at the lunchbox in my hand, then quickly looked away. "You here for Ethan? They're drinking inside."
"Yeah, I heard it," I replied, my voice coming out way calmer than I expected.
Not only heard it. I'd seen the commentary floating above their heads.
Inside, Ethan kept yelling, "Just wait and see. Agnes is gonna show up with food any minute. Whenever I tell her to do something, she won't dare do the opposite."
Jesse frowned a little.
The live comments kept rolling in. [He's frowning. He's not happy.]
Suddenly, I didn't feel like crying anymore. A weird kind of calm took over.
I looked at Jesse. He was wearing a white T-shirt and gray pants, clean and fresh-looking, completely different from the shirtless, loud shouting guys inside.
"Jesse." I said, "Can you do me a favor?"
He looked up immediately. "Sure."
"Here," I said, handing him the box. "Would you like it?"
He stared blankly at the pink box, like he couldn't believe what was happening.
"I'm not going in," I added. "Can you walk me to my dorm?"
Jesse took the box from me almost too eagerly, nodding hard. "Okay."
As we turned to leave, Ethan called out from inside, "Is that Agnes? I think I heard her voice."
I didn't say a word.
Jesse walked beside me, half a step away, his breathing a little uneven. He held the lunchbox carefully as if it might break.
The live comments came again.
[Step one complete.]
[Lunchbox delivered. Nice job.]
[Look, Jesse is walking stiff like he forgot how to move.]
I stole a glance at him. Jesse's walk was stiff as hell, but it was kind of cute.
"Were you here the whole time?" I asked when we got downstairs.
"I was here for coffee," he replied quickly, then hesitated, his voice going soft. "Actually, I saw you go upstairs, and you never came back down."
The live comments grew wild. [He admitted it. He was worried about you.]
Something inside me melted completely.
"What Ethan said—" I hesitated.
"It's not true," Jesse interrupted, sounding more urgent than I'd ever heard him. "You're nothing like that. He's talking nonsense."
He seemed even more upset about it than I was.
I stopped and looked at him. "Then what do you think of me?"
Jesse froze at the question, his face flushing again. He opened his mouth, struggled for a long moment, and finally said, "You're really good."