Chapter 8
I leaned back against the soft pillow and closed my eyes.
Andy, I'm giving you one chance to explain yourself.
I want to see what your so-called hardship is really about.
When I got back to my estate, I dismissed everyone and sat alone in the living room.
I kept refilling my cup, drinking wine after wine.
I waited from dusk until the moon hung overhead.
Just as I was about to lose my patience, a tall, solitary figure appeared in the doorway.
Andy had finally arrived.
He wasn't wearing his formal attire, just a lightweight blue robe. His face was pale, his lips cracked, and under the moonlight, he looked especially lonely.
He really did look worn out.
He walked in slowly, stopping about three steps away from me.
He just stood there, staring at me, his gaze so tangled with emotion that I couldn't make sense of it.
"Sapphire," he said.
His voice was so rough, it sounded like sandpaper scraping against stone.
I didn't say a word. I just picked up my wine and shook it softly.
He gave a self-mocking smile.
"I know you hate me," he said.
"Five years ago, I messed up.
"I shouldn't have agreed to that marriage just to keep the Hardy family and the Queen Mother happy.
"I thought... I thought that once their power was gone, I'd bring you back right away and finally give you the place you deserved—make you mine, for real.
"I really believed you'd understand me. I thought you'd wait for me.
"But I never expected you to be so resolute, just walking away without saying a word."
He looked at me, and his eyes reddened with emotion.
"I had people searching everywhere for you, for five whole years, but there was never a single trace," he said.
"I thought... I thought you were lost to me forever.
"Sapphire, these past five years, I haven't slept peacefully even once. Every time I close my eyes, I see you standing in the snow, just staring at me.
"I'm sorry." He finally managed to say that word.
Five years late. Too late.
My heart felt like it was being crushed by some invisible force, hurting so much I could barely catch my breath.
So... that's the truth.
So that wedding everyone in the Capital was talking about—it was all just an act.
Why didn't he ever tell me?
Why did he just assume I'd get it? Assume I'd stick around for him?
I set my cup down and looked up, meeting his gaze.
"Mr. Saunders," I said, my tone distant.
"That's quite a story.
"But I'm not the heroine in your tale.
"All I know is, the day you got married, it felt like my whole world shattered.
"All I know is, I was carrying your child, running for my life in the freezing cold, like I had nowhere to belong.
"You really think just one excuse is enough for me to forgive you?
"Andy, you sure have a high opinion of yourself."
My words cut into Andy like the sharpest blade, leaving him bleeding inside.
All the color drained from his face in an instant.
He stumbled back a step, grabbing the doorframe to steady himself.
"The child..." Andy stared at me, his lips trembling. "Mallory... he's my son?"
"Or what?" I sneered. "Mr. Saunders, did you really think I'd have someone else's kid?"
Hearing my answer, he didn't look relieved; if anything, it was like every ounce of strength had been sucked out of him.
Regret and pain crashed over him, drowning him completely.
He slid down the doorframe, sinking to the floor in slow motion.
The man who once ruled the court with a wave of his hand now looked like a lost child, abandoned by the whole world.
He clutched his head, letting out a low, anguished sound, like a beast trapped in a cage.
"I never knew... I really never knew..." he muttered, his voice shaking with disbelief.
"I let him grow up fatherless, five years, like a bastard...
"I'm sorry for what I did to you... but I'm even more sorry for what I did to him..."
Tears slipped through his fingers.
This was the first time I'd ever seen Andy break down in tears.
The man who always kept his composure, who always had everything figured out, was now crying like a child.
A wave of bittersweet pain washed over me, no matter how hard I tried to fight it.
But I clenched my heart and held back.
Sapphire, you can't let yourself soften.
Did you forget how you managed to survive these five years?
Did you forget how much it stung when he told you to just let it go?
I stood up, towering over him.
"What's the point of saying all this now?" I said coldly.