Chapter 2

After that, I stopped reaching out to James.

I would envy other couples and quietly talk myself down at the same time. James was busy. The company wasn't his alone. He had employees to manage and circling shareholders to guard against. I should be understanding.

So I went shopping by myself. I made myself pretend I was fine.

And now, in the car, Sophie was talking. "Every time I go shopping, my boyfriend carries all my bags," she said. "He tells me girls should get out and buy, buy, buy. It sharpens your eye. You learn what actually suits you."

She held up her left hand, showing off the diamond on her ring finger. It was the same one I'd shown James in a magazine two months ago, asking if he liked it. Back then, he'd only glanced at the page.

"Emily, you're thirty," he had said. "Still chasing after flashy junk? You trying to make yourself a laughingstock?"

I hadn't answered. I'd just looked at the coldness in his face and let that little spark of hope die on its own. I told myself to drop it. James didn't understand romance. I should have accepted that a long time ago.

I never expected the ring I'd wanted for so long to end up on Sophie's finger.

"James flew all the way to Aurelia to get it," Sophie went on, admiring her own hand. "Said he took one look and knew it was made for me. He says a girl in full bloom like me is meant for sparkly things."

Her eyes glowed, a sharp contrast to my own. I looked down at the plain wedding band on my ring finger. James had spent three months' salary on the simple platinum ring back when we still rented a tiny apartment.

He'd been trembling when he proposed to me. "Em, I know I can't afford anything better right now," James had said. "But this is everything I have. Will you..."

"Yes!" I cut him off, already crying. "Yes, I will!"

The band had slipped onto my finger. I thought I'd slipped happiness on with it.

Turned out the "shiny, useless thing" wasn't the ring itself. It was me. I wasn't worth it.

A dense, layered pain spread through my chest. I fought to keep the tears down and forced myself to nod along.

"I'm honestly jealous," I said, meaning every word. "You have a boyfriend who treats you well."

My eyes followed the ring, then lifted to the man in the driver's seat. I made myself smile. "I used to have a man who loved me to the bone, too," I said.

The car lurched to a hard stop. Momentum threw me forward. My head slammed against the back of the front seat, and the pain blacked out my vision for a second. Sophie's voice cut through.

"James Carter!"

He was already patting her back, calm as anything. "Sorry, sorry. Did I scare you?"

He held Sophie close, and his eyes flicked to me with a cold edge. He mouthed a warning so only I could see it. "Don't say anything stupid. Be sensible."

Sensible again. Even now, James still expected me to be sensible. To sit here and watch him nuzzle another woman. To watch her sit in front of me and flaunt their love. He wanted me to be the outsider. The spectator.

Sophie looked ready to cry. Luckily, James coaxed her out of it fast. The car rejoined the flow of traffic. She finally came back to herself and turned around to me.

"Emily," she said, "what were you about to say? Something about a man who loved you to the bone. Do you mean your husband?"

She pouted. "Alex told me you're married. I've been at the company for two weeks and still haven't met him. It's pouring today, yet he didn't even pick you up. What kind of workaholic doesn't come get his own wife in weather like this?"

Sophie fixed her gaze on me. "A woman shouldn't be too accommodating. If James didn't come pick me up, there's no way I'd wait around for him.

"I'd find someone else in a heartbeat and make him regret it. Only stupid women try to understand men. Men want what they can't tame. Don't be so accommodating to your husband. Take James. Last month, I had cramps and called him."

"He said he was busy or something. So I turned right around and called my ex, then sent James a photo of us. He was there in under ten minutes. Swore to me he'd never be too busy for me again."

Sophie tilted her head at me. "Emily, take notes."

Listening to her chatter, I remembered last month. I had just found out I was pregnant. Before the joy could even sink in, I was struck by a car while rushing to bring James a file. I lost the baby right there.

I called him, sobbing. He told me he was on his way. He kept saying, "Hold on. Wait for me." His voice was frantic, cracking with tears.