Chapter 1

We'd been together for five years, but Andrew Cooper—this guy who was a year ahead of her in college—was like a shadow she couldn't shake. He never left her alone.

Anna Summers was so fed up with him constantly hovering that, just to put some distance between them once and for all, she said yes to my proposal.

But a month before the wedding, Andrew showed up with a brain tumor diagnosis, telling her he had less than two years left.

After that, Anna was like a whole new person. Everything started to revolve around Andrew. She was all over him, fussing over every little thing.

I tried to keep my anger in check as I confronted her, but she acted like it was totally normal.

"Andrew has always loved me. Now that he's dying, I just want to help him fulfill his last wish. Why are you so heartless?" she said.

I thought that after the wedding, she'd finally come back to me.

But then, one day, she told me she wanted to use IVF to give Andrew a child, so he'd have someone to carry on his legacy.

I called off the wedding and boarded a flight to a research institute overseas.

*****

Three years later, I returned home with my new wife.

Anna stood blocking the entrance, her face a mess of tears.

"How could you walk away from me and marry someone else?" she cried.

"You were my fiancée. I'd never let you bear another man's child," I said.

I leaned against the doorframe, letting out a weary sigh, my voice so hoarse it barely sounded like me.

Seeing I wasn't backing down, Anna grabbed a glass from the coffee table and threw it at me.

"It's just IVF! There's nothing between Andrew and me. I haven't slept with him, nothing happened. Why can't you just agree?" she yelled.

I didn't dodge.

The glass smacked right into my forehead, bounced off, and shattered all over the floor.

My forehead swelled up instantly, but the sting in my skin was nothing compared to the ache from Anna's words.

I stared at the woman I'd loved for twelve years, feeling utterly hollow inside.

"Anna, you're throwing things at me just to make me say yes?" I said.

Anna hadn't expected to actually hit me. She'd lashed out in a moment of anger, and now she looked a little panicked.

She crouched down and reached out, gently touching the swollen spot on my forehead.

"Ethan, I didn't mean it. I just got upset," Anna said.

"Andrew has loved me for six years. Now he's got a brain tumor and could be gone any day. He just wants a child with me. That's his only wish. I just can't turn him down," Anna said.

"I can't just let someone who loves me die with regrets," she added.

"You love me too, so you should understand how Andrew feels. I've already agreed to marry you. After that, I'll be yours for life. All Andrew wants is a child from me. Is that asking too much?" Anna said.

I closed my eyes.

He'd loved you for six years, but what about me?

I've loved you for twelve whole years.

Ever since that first day we ended up in the same class back in middle school, through college, through our jobs, all the way to now.

The wedding was just twenty days away. I really thought my wait was finally over, that I'd get to marry the girl I'd loved since we were kids.

But now, Anna wanted to bear Andrew's child.

There isn't a man alive who could stand watching the woman he loves get pregnant with another man's baby.

And I sure as hell couldn't.

"Anna, I'm asking you one last time. Are you really going to bear Andrew's child?" I asked.

She nodded without the slightest trace of hesitation.

"Of course. Andrew's condition is getting worse, so I need to hurry up and get pregnant," she said.

At that moment, it was like someone just hollowed me out.

After I proposed, I was the one handling every single thing for the wedding: picking the venue, choosing the dress, arranging the seating, and even finalizing the menu. Anna never even asked about any of it.

But now, when it came to having Andrew's child, she was more invested than she'd ever been in anything else.

Was she really just trying to help him fulfill his last wish, or did she secretly want a child with Andrew all along?

I didn't dare let my thoughts go any further.

Anna looked like she wanted to say something else, but then her phone rang in her pocket.

She pulled it out, her eyes lighting up as she headed for the balcony.

I stared at her back, a wry, bitter smile twisting my lips.

A bitter weight settled heavy in my chest.

Anna and I were real childhood sweethearts. We were in the same class in grade school, went to the same middle school, and even got into the same college.

I knew I was into her way back, even when we were kids.

I was always hanging around, sticking close to her, but she never seemed to notice me at all.

It took three years after graduation before she finally noticed me and agreed to be my girlfriend.

After knowing each other for over twenty years, you'd think we'd be closer, more trusting, after being a couple.

But after five years, I'd never even touched her phone. She always made sure to take her calls away from me.

One time, she was lying in bed with a high fever, and her phone kept ringing.

To avoid disturbing her, I tried to put it on silent for her.

But the moment my finger touched the screen, she shot up in bed, stared at me, and snapped, "Are you trying to go through my phone?"

She wouldn't hear a word I said, no matter how I tried to explain.

That night, I sat on the living room couch until dawn.

I kept telling myself she was just being herself, and that someday, I'd finally break through her walls.

But five years went by, and nothing changed.

It got even worse. Now she was ready to have another man's child, like I didn't even exist to her anymore, even though I was supposed to be her boyfriend.

When Anna came back from the balcony, she was practically glowing.

She threw on her coat and headed out.

I listened to her hurried footsteps, my mind going completely blank.