Chapter 3
Aside from the kids' birthdays, even my own special days would get overlooked if Sean was busy.
But when I really think about it, for five years straight, every year on Crystal's birthday, Sean would always leave work hours early just to be home.
He never missed it, no matter how busy he was.
Suddenly, I felt uneasy inside.
Even after sharing a bed with him for five years, even after giving him two kids, I still can't hold the same place in his heart as Crystal.
That realization stung. Was I really never going to matter to him as much as Crystal did?
Suddenly, the thought hit me, catching me off guard.
I guess, in the end, I still ended up hurt by Sean.
While I was spacing out, lost in my own thoughts, Sean had already taken a seat next to Crystal, with Percy and Nicki by his side.
They sat together, facing me as I stood alone. The divide between us was painfully clear.
I wanted to flip the whole table over and let my anger spill out.
But seeing Percy and Nicki eyeing the food, swallowing their saliva, I couldn't do it.
Once one had a soft spot, one would always be vulnerable.
"I'm tired. You guys go ahead and eat," I said, my voice flat.
That night, Sean and Crystal took Percy and Nicki out for another movie night.
I was hoping to have a talk with the kids tonight.
I sat in my room, waiting for them to come back.
It wasn't until nine o'clock that Percy sent me a few photos from his smartwatch.
They were just some random close-up selfies he'd taken.
But in the background, every single shot showed Sean and Crystal with their fingers intertwined.
They were out with my kids, playing happy family.
In the last five years where I'd been clueless, how many times had this exact scene played out?
Disgust welled up in my throat, threatening to choke me.
I bolted for the bathroom, heaving. God, I was so sick I could barely breathe.
When Sean came back, he was all smiles.
But the moment he saw me, he looked like he'd been caught red-handed.
His smile vanished in an instant.
I pretended not to notice the guilt on his face and reached out with my hand.
"Percy, Nicki, come on. Let's go upstairs and get ready for bed," I said.
Whenever Crystal wasn't around, the kids always listened to me.
They each grabbed one of my hands and quietly followed me upstairs.
After we finished getting ready for bed, I hugged Percy and Nicki close.
I tried to sound casual as I asked them, "If Mommy and Daddy ever split up, would you want to live with me?"
My soft Nicki hugged me tight, her voice all sweet and childish. "It's fine living with you, Mommy, but you have to bring Crystal along too. That way Daddy will follow, and we'll all be a family again."
Percy gave Nicki a little tap on the arm.
"You're such a dummy, Nicki. If Mommy and Daddy split up, that means they're getting divorced. After that, Daddy will definitely marry Crystal, and he won't live with Mom anymore," Percy said.
Percy turned away from me, ignoring me as he played on his tablet.
"Whatever. I'm sticking with Dad. You can have Mom," Percy said.
When Nicki realized she had to choose me, her eyes filled with tears instantly.
"I don't want Mommy, I want Crystal. I want to be with Daddy too," Nicki cried, clutching my sleeve.
I never expected Crystal to mean so much to the kids.
Her presence in their lives ran deeper than I ever imagined.
Even though I'd been working a lot these past few years, but I'd always been there for my kids, no matter how busy I was.
I knew I wasn't a bad mom.
But hearing them say stuff like this, even if they were just joking, still made me feel insecure.
I put my career on hold right away.
Before the divorce was finalized, I devoted myself completely to taking care of the kids at home.
I'd already handed the divorce papers to Sean.
Even though he still hadn't signed them, As soon as the cooling-off period ended, I'd file for a forced divorce.
Sean took the papers, his eyes red. He looked like he was hurting inside.
He said, "Mabelle, are you really going to be this cold to me?
"Yeah, I admit I kept my ex a secret before we got married, but I'm married to you now, aren't I? Me and Crystal are done for good. Why are you still so hung up on this?"
I watched as Sean ripped the divorce papers to shreds right in front of me.
I thought, then said, "Then kick Crystal out of this house."
His face went rigid for a moment, pain etched across his features.
It was obvious. Hesitation, turmoil, even outright resistance were written all over him.
He balled his fists at his sides, knuckles white.
He was silent for what felt like forever before finally meeting my gaze.
"Mabelle, I promised Crystal I'd look after her for the rest of her life. If I go back on that now, I wouldn't be much of a man," he said, his voice rough with emotion.