Chapter 1
Back when I was adorably chubby, Kellen Richard kept showing up in our classroom, always bringing me drinks.
It was obvious he had a thing for my deskmate.
So, in return, I secretly fed Kellen snacks and even helped him win over my deskmate.
Later, I fell ill and went abroad.
Eight years passed. I returned for heart surgery.
In the hospital room, the nurse asked casually, "What's your type, Dr. Richard?"
He replied calmly, "Short hair, round face, fair skin, a little chubby. Like a little squirrel who sneaks me snacks, especially beef jerky."
Our eyes met. I instinctively hugged the beef jerky in my hand a little tighter.
*****
It was barely three days into the new semester when I started noticing Kellen Richard, the undisputed heartthrob of our school, lingering around our classroom almost every day.
"Julianne, come out for a second," he said.
His voice drifted in from the back door, calm and effortless. He stood there holding a plastic bag.
At the time, Julianne Osborn was explaining a math problem to me.
The moment she heard him, she tossed her pen aside and bolted out of the room without hesitation.
I leaned against the windowsill, pretending not to look while sneaking glances anyway.
In the far corner of the hallway, Kellen handed the bag to Julianne. She smiled up at him, eyes bright and gleaming.
That was when the girl in the front row, the one who thrived on gossip, twisted around in her seat, clearly excited to share.
"Hey, have you heard the latest?" The girl in the front row who's always gossiping spun around, her story full of juicy details.
She continued, "Kellen and Julianne? They go way back. Childhood sweethearts, basically. I walked past the bike shed the other day and heard Julianne calling Kellen 'big brother' in that cute voice.
"She says they're just like siblings, but honestly, do you believe that? I bet you a spicy stick. Kellen is definitely crushing on Julianne!"
My gaze dropped to the black plastic bag in Julianne's hand.
Through the thin material, I could vaguely make out pink packaging, pads, most likely, and two bottles of water.
Kellen said something quietly to her, then suddenly glanced in my direction.
I flinched and instinctively looked away, guilt prickling at my skin.
Julianne soon bounced back into the classroom and set a bottle of orange soda on my desk.
"Kellen wanted you to have this," she said.
That bottle had just been in his hand. And it was my favorite flavor.
When she noticed me spacing out, she quickly added, "Don't overthink it. He heard you've been really good to me, so he just wanted to say thanks."
I smiled. I truly was happy for Julianne. And yet, there was an ache in my chest, faint, but undeniable.
The truth was, I was no different from the other girls. I liked Kellen too. Quietly. Secretly.
Still, I made up my mind then and there: I'd help him win her over.
From that day on, I arrived at school half an hour earlier than everyone else.
Like a thief, I'd sneak into the classroom next door and carefully slip premium imported beef jerky into Kellen's desk cubby.
He was tall, but far too thin. He needed to gain some weight.
Every time, I'd also leave a small note, written in my best imitation of Julianne's handwriting:
[You got this! You're totally awesome!]
[Best brother ever. I'm your little sunshine!]
*****
After that, I'd return to my own classroom and, before Julianne arrived, tuck a small gift into her desk as well.
The moment I saw her reach into her cubby, I rushed over.
"Hey," I teased, "is that a surprise from Kellen?"
She shot me a strange look.
"Him? I'd rather believe it was some kind fairy or angel," she said.
I put on my most serious expression and spun an elaborate lie. "I swear I saw Kellen sneaking around your desk earlier. It has to be him."
Julianne looked like she wanted to say something, but in the end, she didn't.
I knew how this worked. Pretty girls got shy easily. If she didn't deny it, that was basically confirmation.
As long as she believed it came from Kellen, my mission was accomplished.
That afternoon during PE, I sat beneath a tree, reading.
When I glanced up over the edge of my book, I spotted Kellen sitting on the horizontal bar, the beef jerky I'd given him in his hand.
Suddenly, he turned. His gaze cut straight through the crowd and landed on me.
Startled, I quickly hid my face behind the book.
After a while, I cautiously lowered it just enough to peek.
Kellen had climbed down and was now standing beside Julianne.
He broke the beef jerky into smaller pieces and handed them to her.
At one point, he even fed her directly, lifting the jerky to her lips with his own fingers.
Not long after, the PE rep signed me up for the girls' long-term race without asking.
I had a heart condition. No one knew, except the principal.
On race day, the starting gun fired. Before I even reached the halfway point, a girl ahead of me suddenly cut into my lane.
I couldn't react in time. My left ankle twisted sharply, and I crashed onto the track.
Julianne came sprinting over as if she were running the hundred-meter dash, panic filling her eyes.
"Why are you just standing there?" she yelled at the boys nearby. "Help me get her to the nurse's office!"
Laughter erupted around us, loud, sharp, and humiliating.
"With Eloise's size, even eight of us couldn't lift her," one boy sneered.
"If I throw my back out, does that count as worker's comp?" another joked.
Then, a shadow fell over me.
Before I could react, strong arms slid beneath my back and knees.
In the next second, I was lifted clean off the ground.