Chapter 1
At three months pregnant, I was suffering from severe morning sickness and had a serious craving for pineapples.
But because of James Carter's extreme mysophobia, I held back from eating that kind of fruit.
Today, at a get-together with my girlfriends, they felt bad for me and insisted on calling him to see if he'd make an exception for me.
The call went through, but a woman picked up instead. "James is busy right now. Hang on a second."
Right after, one of my friends spotted a video James's first girlfriend had just posted on her feed.
In the video, James, who was always so refined and meticulous, didn't even take off his coat.
He peeled a Golden pineapple, trying hard not to gag, and handed it to that woman's lips with a look of deep concern in his eyes.
When I got home that night, James saw the video on my phone. Instead of explaining, he looked annoyed.
He said, "She just had surgery and lost her appetite. I was taking care of her. Do you really have to blow this out of proportion?
"You're pregnant now, so try to be more sensible. Stop picking up all this drama from your friends."
James tossed his credit card onto the table. "Go buy it yourself tomorrow. I'm letting you have one, so quit whining."
I didn't even look at the card. I just got up and went back to my room.
As I walked away, I pulled out the ultrasound results showing the baby had stopped growing, crumpled them up, and threw them in the trash.
*****
"Why are you still here at home? Didn't I already give you the card?" James said.
He was standing in front of the mirror, taking his time to straighten his tie.
He glanced at me through the mirror, his tone flat.
He said, "If you're still mad about yesterday, you really don't have to be.
"Olivia just got back from abroad and had some stomach trouble, so she had a minor surgery. I'm her friend and was looking after her. Is that really such a big deal?"
I sat on the couch, staring at his suit, and gave a quiet reply. "Mhmm."
James turned around, his brows furrowing slightly.
He seemed a bit thrown off by my indifferent attitude, but he didn't press the issue.
He walked over to the entryway to change his shoes, still talking with his back to me. "I've got a really important international meeting this afternoon, so I can't go with you to your checkup.
"Call a cab or let the driver take you.
"If you want something to eat, just buy it yourself. Don't let people think I'm neglecting you."
With that, he opened the door and left without even looking back.
As the security door clicked shut, the house fell completely silent.
I looked down at the black card on the coffee table.
This was the kind of special treatment I'd always dreamed of.
Now, it just felt painfully ironic.
I got up, walked to the kitchen, poured myself a glass of water, and drank it slowly.
A faint heaviness tugged at my belly.
I didn't cry or make a scene. I just calmly changed my clothes, grabbed my bag, and walked out.
At the downtown hospital's obstetrics and gynecology department, the hallway was bustling with people.
Most of them were husbands by their wives' sides, beaming with excitement for the arrival of their babies.
I sat alone on a bench in the waiting area, holding my registration slip tightly.
"Emily Lane, please go to room three." The nurse's voice came through the loudspeaker.
I stood up and walked into the room.
The doctor looked at the test results on the computer, her voice tinged with regret. "Ms. Lane, the ultrasound from yesterday confirms it. The pregnancy is no longer viable.
"The morning sickness you're feeling is actually your body reacting to the lLos.
"I recommend scheduling a D&C as soon as possible. If we wait too long, it could be dangerous for you."
I stared at the fetal heartbeat monitor on the desk, feeling utterly empty and desolate inside.
"Okay, please schedule the surgery as soon as possible," I said.
The doctor gave me a surprised look.
She said, "We actually have an opening this afternoon, but someone from your family will need to be here to sign the consent form and stay with you.
"Did your husband not come with you?"
I shook my head, my voice barely above a whisper. "He's busy. Can I sign for myself?"
The doctor sighed and handed me a stack of forms.
"Go pay on the first floor, and be at the operating room entrance by 1:30 this afternoon," she said.
I walked out of the room with the forms in hand.
Just as I reached the elevator, I heard a familiar male voice. "Slow down. The doctor said your stomach is still fragile."
I instinctively looked up.
It was James who was dressed smartly in a suit, holding onto a woman in a dress.
It was Olivia Stone, the so-called first love he said just had minor surgery and supposedly couldn't eat a thing.
But right now, she was snuggled up to James, holding a cup of coffee.
"James, I'm really not that fragile," Olivia said.
She looked up at him, her smile warm and gentle. "I just got a craving for Golden Pineapples yesterday. Sorry for making you fuss over me."
James's gaze was full of tenderness.
"As long as you will eat it, it's no bother at all," he said.
I stood a few steps away, watching this scene that felt like a slap in the face.
James, who said he had an important international meeting this afternoon, was actually here with another woman for her checkup.
I didn't flinch. I just quietly stood there, watching them walk toward me.
James glanced up, locking eyes with me.
His smile faltered.
Surprise flashed in his eyes, quickly giving way to annoyance.
"Emily?" he called out.
He let go of Olivia and strode over to me.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
Before I could answer, he spotted the payment slip in my hand, and his frown grew even deeper.
"Are you following me?" he demanded.
His voice was sharp and accusing, like he was absolutely convinced I was up to something.