Chapter 1

For the Independence Day holiday, my boyfriend and I planned a trip down south to finally fulfill a long-awaited promise.

On the eve of our trip, he held my hand gently, pointing to the Railway Express app on his phone with hesitation. "Babe, something came up.

"Emily is heading Southern Shores on her own, and she's feeling pretty down. I really can't leave her alone right now.

"I pushed your ticket back by one train. Go ahead first and wait for me at the hotel. As soon as I settle her down, I will catch up with you, okay?"

I looked into his flickering eyes and nodded softly.

He let out a sigh of relief and pulled me into an embrace, oblivious to the sound of my heart shattering. He had no idea that I was not going to wait for him in that warm Southern Shores after all.

I turned around, canceled the delayed ticket, and bought a ticket for the next train bound for the snowy north.

Up north, there was my hometown, blanketed in snow and ice, and my childhood friend who cherished me like the world.

This time, heading up north meant walking away without ever looking back.

*****

On the eve of the holiday, the air should have been sweet and cozy. Instead, Daniel's slight hesitation hit me like a cold dose of reality, piercing right through my expectations.

He held my hand, sweet-talking me with a gentleness that felt almost cruel. The bright orange interface of Railway Express on his phone screen was a total eyesore.

We had planned this trip down south for ages. Yet, his thumb hovered right over the "reschedule" button. "Babe, something came up," he said.

His voice was still the deep, mellow tone I had fallen for over the years. Yet every word that followed cut through me like a knife. "Emily is going Southern Shores alone, and she's feeling pretty down."

Emily Shaw had haunted Daniel and me like a curse for three years.

"I really can't leave her alone right now," he added.

The genuine worry and helplessness in his voice made my chest tighten.

Look at that. He was always Mr. Nice Guy to everyone, especially to Emily. That endless willingness to cater to her beck and call used to strike me as kindness. Now, it felt downright laughable.

"I pushed your ticket back by one train." He did not even bother asking for my input before laying down the law on my wait. "Go ahead first and wait for me at the hotel.

"As soon as I settle her down, I will catch up with you, okay?"

He glanced down at me, his eyes flickering with a guilty plea for forgiveness that made my stomach turn.

I stared into those deep eyes I had once been so lost in. The reflection of me in them looked like a fool waiting to hear her sentence.

I nodded softly. My throat felt tight, as though something had lodged there, and I couldn't get a word out.

That one little "okay" took everything I had left in me.

Daniel looked relieved. He immediately pulled me into his arms. His embrace was still warm. He still smelled clean and familiar.

Once, his arms had been the safest place in the world. But now, all I felt was a bone-deep chill.

He held me tightly, as if it could make up for having to leave me at the last minute.

But he had no idea. The woman in his arms had already fallen to pieces inside. He would never know that I wasn't going to the warm Southern Shores to wait for him anymore.

At the hotel we had picked out together, there would be no woman named Julia Rivers sitting there like a fool, waiting for her boyfriend to come back after comforting another woman.

The moment he turned around and rushed off to take care of Emily, I dragged my heavy suitcase to the ticket counter in the opposite direction.

I returned the ticket he'd so generously postponed for me, the one that was supposed to take me south.

Without a second thought, I bought a ticket for the next train heading north.

The South was warm. It was the future Daniel had promised me.

But the Northernlands were cold and buried in snow. They were also home.

And waiting there was Lucas North, my childhood friend, the one who had always been the first to reach out a hand whenever I was at my lowest.

This time, I was heading all the way north. Maybe I wasn't going back anymore.

The roar of the train drowned out the last bit of longing in my heart.

Daniel, go keep your precious warm. I was going back to my ice and snow.