Chapter 1 · He Wished Me Dead On My Birthday

When I was nine, I lost part of my hearing saving Alex Carter from an explosion.

Half my world had been silent ever since.

He felt guilty.

He begged our families to arrange an engagement.

With red-rimmed eyes, he swore, "Emma, I'll take care of you for the rest of my life."

But it was on my eighteenth birthday.

To prove himself to the school's most popular girl, he ripped off my hearing aid in front of everyone. His voice dripped with disgust. "I've been sick of you, you little burden.

"I wish they hadn't saved you back then. I wish you'd died."

I said nothing. My hand was wrapped around the hearing recovery report in my pocket.

*****

A sharp burst of electric noise exploded in my cochlea, then everything fell into utter silence.

Alex tore my hearing aid right off.

His fingers gripped the tiny, flesh-colored device as if it were some revolting piece of garbage.

I couldn't hear the students' laughter around me.

But I could see their exaggerated mouths and twisted smiles.

Olivia Lane, the campus queen, leaned against Alex, laughing so hard her whole body shook, her lips coated in a refined mauve lipstick, moving as she spoke.

I could read her lips.

She said, "Alex, you're so handsome."

Alex looked smug, soaking up the attention.

He tilted his chin and flung the hearing aid to one of his lackeys behind him. "Trash it."

He towered over me, his gaze icy and filled with a disgust I'd never seen before. "Emma, are you satisfied now?"

Was I satisfied with what?

"You've been pretending to be deaf for nine years to make me feel guilty. Aren't you tired of it?" he spat.

Was I pretending?

I was stunned.

His icy voice was barely audible in my other ear, the one with barely any hearing left.

"I'm not playing along anymore.

"You're nothing but dead weight. I've been sick of you for ages."

His voice was soft, but every word felt like a poisoned blade, stabbing into my heart over and over.

I looked at him, the boy I lost half my hearing to save.

He used to be so remorseful, so gentle.

Every day after school, he'd help me with my notes, repeating the teacher's key points into my ear, word by word.

He'd say, "Emma, it's okay if you can't hear. I'll be your ears.

"Emma, don't be afraid. I'll always be by your side.

"Emma, I'll always look after you, forever."

But at that moment, to make another girl smile, he shattered every promise he'd ever made to me.

I saw Olivia whisper something in his ear.

Alex looked even more annoyed.

He leaned down, got close to my ear, and spoke slowly, enunciating each word so only I could hear, "I wish you hadn't survived when you were nine. It would've been better if you'd died."

It was like a bomb went off in my head.

The world went completely silent.

I couldn't feel the pain in my ears, or the ache in my heart.

I stood there, numb, staring at the disgust in his eyes.

So, he wanted me dead.

The thin piece of paper in my pocket felt like it was burning up in my hand from how tightly I was clutching it.

It was the check-up report I got this morning.

The doctor had smiled at me and said, "Emma, congratulations. Your cochlear nerve has fully recovered. You won't need a hearing aid anymore."

I wanted him to be the first to know as a birthday gift.

But I guess there was no need.

I looked at him, then at Olivia, who flashed a radiant smile at his side.

Without saying a word, I turned and walked out of that classroom thick with mockery and malice, with everyone watching.

Behind me, Alex's stunned voice echoed faintly.

But I was done listening.

Alex, from that moment on, our paths would never cross again.

There was no need for us to meet again.

When I got home, my parents still weren't back from work.

In the empty living room, I sat on the couch and set the sweat-soaked recovery report and a crumpled piece of paper on the coffee table.

The crumpled paper was Alex's personal statement draft.

He wanted to go to Capitavia University, majoring in finance.

So, I chose Capitavia University, too, in journalism instead.

I always imagined we would be like other couples, go to Capitavia University together, graduate, get married, and stay by each other's side forever.

But in the end, it was my own wishful thinking.

Chapter 1

When I was nine, I lost part of my hearing saving Alex Carter from an explosion.

Half my world had been silent ever since.

He felt guilty.

He begged our families to arrange an engagement.

With red-rimmed eyes, he swore, "Emma, I'll take care of you for the rest of my life."

But it was on my eighteenth birthday.

To prove himself to the school's most popular girl, he ripped off my hearing aid in front of everyone. His voice dripped with disgust. "I've been sick of you, you little burden.

"I wish they hadn't saved you back then. I wish you'd died."

I said nothing. My hand was wrapped around the hearing recovery report in my pocket.

*****

A sharp burst of electric noise exploded in my cochlea, then everything fell into utter silence.

Alex tore my hearing aid right off.

His fingers gripped the tiny, flesh-colored device as if it were some revolting piece of garbage.

I couldn't hear the students' laughter around me.

But I could see their exaggerated mouths and twisted smiles.

Olivia Lane, the campus queen, leaned against Alex, laughing so hard her whole body shook, her lips coated in a refined mauve lipstick, moving as she spoke.

I could read her lips.

She said, "Alex, you're so handsome."

Alex looked smug, soaking up the attention.

He tilted his chin and flung the hearing aid to one of his lackeys behind him. "Trash it."

He towered over me, his gaze icy and filled with a disgust I'd never seen before. "Emma, are you satisfied now?"

Was I satisfied with what?

"You've been pretending to be deaf for nine years to make me feel guilty. Aren't you tired of it?" he spat.

Was I pretending?

I was stunned.

His icy voice was barely audible in my other ear, the one with barely any hearing left.

"I'm not playing along anymore.

"You're nothing but dead weight. I've been sick of you for ages."

His voice was soft, but every word felt like a poisoned blade, stabbing into my heart over and over.

I looked at him, the boy I lost half my hearing to save.

He used to be so remorseful, so gentle.

Every day after school, he'd help me with my notes, repeating the teacher's key points into my ear, word by word.

He'd say, "Emma, it's okay if you can't hear. I'll be your ears.

"Emma, don't be afraid. I'll always be by your side.

"Emma, I'll always look after you, forever."

But at that moment, to make another girl smile, he shattered every promise he'd ever made to me.

I saw Olivia whisper something in his ear.

Alex looked even more annoyed.

He leaned down, got close to my ear, and spoke slowly, enunciating each word so only I could hear, "I wish you hadn't survived when you were nine. It would've been better if you'd died."

It was like a bomb went off in my head.

The world went completely silent.

I couldn't feel the pain in my ears, or the ache in my heart.

I stood there, numb, staring at the disgust in his eyes.

So, he wanted me dead.

The thin piece of paper in my pocket felt like it was burning up in my hand from how tightly I was clutching it.

It was the check-up report I got this morning.

The doctor had smiled at me and said, "Emma, congratulations. Your cochlear nerve has fully recovered. You won't need a hearing aid anymore."

I wanted him to be the first to know as a birthday gift.

But I guess there was no need.

I looked at him, then at Olivia, who flashed a radiant smile at his side.

Without saying a word, I turned and walked out of that classroom thick with mockery and malice, with everyone watching.

Behind me, Alex's stunned voice echoed faintly.

But I was done listening.

Alex, from that moment on, our paths would never cross again.

There was no need for us to meet again.

When I got home, my parents still weren't back from work.

In the empty living room, I sat on the couch and set the sweat-soaked recovery report and a crumpled piece of paper on the coffee table.

The crumpled paper was Alex's personal statement draft.

He wanted to go to Capitavia University, majoring in finance.

So, I chose Capitavia University, too, in journalism instead.

I always imagined we would be like other couples, go to Capitavia University together, graduate, get married, and stay by each other's side forever.

But in the end, it was my own wishful thinking.