Chapter 3
"What has she lost?"
Ethan didn't answer.
"Because you married me?"
"Claire, let's not do this over the phone."
"You brought it up."
He sighed.
"When I was seventeen, I promised I'd marry her when we grew up. Give her a home. I hadn't met you yet."
I slowly sat down.
No wonder Vivian always said Paige was the one who knew how to take care of him. No wonder he stopped listening to me whenever Paige brought up their childhood.
I'd always thought they just weren't used to having someone new in the family.
It turned out that, to them, I was the outsider who'd barged in.
"Did she know when we got together?"
"Of course. I told her sophomore year. You're the one I love."
"Then what are you still trying to make up for?"
"Mom always thought we would—"
"Your mother's expectations aren't a debt I owe."
He fell silent.
"If that promise is over, stop using it to make me give in. I don't owe her anything."
That afternoon, he booked Paige a ride.
That evening, he set his phone in front of me.
On the screen was a restaurant reservation for Saturday. Two people. Seven o'clock.
Our wedding anniversary.
"I remembered," he said. "A table by the window. At the place you love."
He pulled a photograph from a pocket in his wallet.
The two of us in college, squeezed into a photo booth. He was kissing my cheek, and I was laughing with my eyes shut.
The edges of the photo had worn white.
"You still have that?"
"Three wallets later. Never threw it out."
I ran a finger over the crease. He took my hand and didn't mention Paige.
When my mother was unexpectedly hospitalized during college, he'd rushed over and sat with me all night.
The year I started freelancing, I'd worried about the unreliable income. He'd moved an old desk to the window and told me this would be my office.
I knew he could be good to me.
Those memories were why I kept thinking that if I explained it one more time, he'd understand.
On Saturday, I put on my blue dress. Ethan zipped me up, his hand lingering on my shoulder.
"You look beautiful."
I met his eyes in the mirror and smiled.
When we came downstairs, Vivian was setting out plates.
"Paige didn't get the job. She hasn't said a word all day. Change your reservation to four."
Ethan looked at me.
I fastened my earring.
"It's our wedding anniversary."
"It's just dinner. Why does it matter who comes?"
"Tonight is just for the two of us."
Paige sat on the couch, looking down as she twisted a tissue in her hands.
"Go ahead. I'm used to it."
Ethan walked over, bent down, and said a few words to her.
I stood by the door, the car keys growing warm in my grip.
At six forty, I reminded him it was time to leave.
"You go ahead. I'll be right behind you."
I didn't cancel the reservation for him.
At seven, the server pulled out my chair by the window and asked if I wanted to wait for my guest before he served the wine.
"Just water for now, please."
My phone lit up.
"She can't stop crying," Ethan said. "Give me ten minutes."
"You know what today is."
"I know. I won't miss it."
At seven twenty, I ordered.
At seven forty-five, the server cleared the place setting across from me and gently asked if I still needed the other chair.
I looked toward the entrance.
"No."
"Happy Anniversary" was written on my dessert. I ate the last bite and paid the bill.
When I got home, Ethan and Paige were sitting on the couch, watching a comedy. There was ice cream in front of her.
He stood up the moment he saw me.
"I was just about to call you."
"Is she feeling better now?"
"Claire—"
"You promised you'd come. I waited until the server cleared your place setting."
Paige looked at him. I didn't wait for him to answer for her. I went straight upstairs.
Ethan followed me into the bedroom.
"We can go tomorrow, okay?"
I took off my earrings and put them back in their box.
"I want you to talk to your mother about moving out."
"Now?"
"This week. Give me a date."
He looked at the clothes I'd left on the bed when I changed for our date.
"Okay. I'll talk to her this week."
I closed the jewelry box. I didn't ask him to promise again.