Chapter 1

Three months before the SAT, I applied to transfer schools just to get away from my childhood friend, Ryan Cooper, because Jessica Lane, the captain of the training team, framed me, and Ryan chose to believe her. He even slapped me across the face.

Eighteen years of feelings for him were nothing compared to the three years of sweet words and gentle concern Jessica gave him.

Heartbroken and worn out, I decided to switch to another school.

But I never imagined that after I left, Ryan would throw himself into the school's swimming pool. "Emily, without you, what's the point of taking the exam?"

*****

"Ryan, you've known Emily for 18 years. You two grew up together, and she's liked you since you were kids. But now there's Jessica—the tall, gorgeous captain of the training team—who chased after you for three whole years in high school. So who do you really like?"

"Of course it's gotta be Jessica. She's fun and outgoing, way more interesting than Emily the nerd. Ryan didn't even bother to invite Emily to his birthday this year."

Behind the door of the KTV private room, I could hear Ryan's friends and Jessica cracking up.

Then I heard Ryan complaining inside, "Why would I call her? She'll just pick a fight with Jessica again. She's such a pain.

"Emily's just a total nerd. She doesn't get romance at all. She just does whatever I say and never has a mind of her own. Seriously, she's so dull. Who would ever be into her? If our families weren't so close, I would've cut off that clingy tagalong ages ago."

My grip on the rose tightened, and the thorns stabbed into my palm. Blood trickled down my wrist.

But I barely felt it because that tiny sting was nothing compared to the one in my chest.

I let out a bitter, self-mocking laugh. Eighteen years of feelings turned out to be nothing but a joke.

Today was Ryan's birthday, and it was also the thirtieth day since we last spoke.

Back during Christmas, we'd planned to watch the fireworks together on Christmas Eve. But because of Jessica, Ryan bailed on me.

We fought badly over it, and after that he simply stopped talking to me. In all 18 years, it was the longest we had ever gone without speaking. He didn't even invite me to his birthday.

If my mother hadn't nagged me, given me the address, and practically pushed me out the door, I wouldn't even be here.

"Boys care about their pride," she'd said. "You grew up together, and you even had a childhood engagement. So what if you apologize first? Go on, hurry."

On my way, I picked up a bouquet of flowers and headed to the KTV where Ryan was celebrating his birthday. But I never expected to overhear something that shook me to my core.

Ryan's father and my father were best friends.

Back in the army, his father had been my father's company commander. During one mission, my father saved his life.

After they both retired, they became sworn brothers.

Ryan was three months younger than me. When he was born, his family was ecstatic and immediately set up an engagement for us.

Growing up, my father was always drilling into my head. "Ryan is your little brother and your future husband. You have to be good to him, and if danger strikes, you must be the first to shield him."

The very first thing I remembered hearing as a kid was, "Ryan is your little husband."

As a kid, I didn't know what a "husband" was. All I knew was that I always had a tag-along glued to my hip.

If I had a snack, he got the first bite.

If I had a new toy, he got the first play.

As we grew older, the snot-nose eventually blossomed into a handsome little guy who would constantly trail after me, calling out, "Emily, your husband is hungry. Go get your husband something to eat, quick.

"Emily, your husband is tired. Come and give your husband a message, fast.

"Emily, your husband is sleepy. Hurry up and sing your husband a lullaby."

If I bought a cake, I'd always give him the biggest slice. If he bought a soda, he'd always let me have the first sip. I'd let him play with my new doll first, and he'd let me be the one to unbox his new toys.

At first, I was just doing what my father told me. But before I knew it, I actually started liking that little brat who kept calling himself my husband.

If he'd wanted something—anything—I would've moved heaven and earth to get it for him.

We went through kindergarten, elementary school, and middle school together. But everything changed when we got to high school.