Chapter 1
I was diagnosed with a rare form of amnesia.
Slowly, steadily, I began to forget everyone around me.
Even Ryan Bennett, the man I loved for years but could never have, was no exception.
I thought he'd be relieved. Instead, he came to me with red-rimmed eyes and said, "You're not allowed to forget me.
If you dare forget, I'll stay right here. I'll make you fall in love with me, again and again.
But later, even his presence became a trigger. The moment he drew near, I'd scream in panic.
He told me he regretted everything. He begged me not to be afraid.
*****
My memory was fading fast.
I could barely remember Ryan's face anymore.
All I had were the sneaky pics I snapped of him, just to remind myself he was real.
Whenever I had a lucid moment, I would text Ryan.
I sent: [Where are you? Can we see each other?]
[If you don't want to meet, that's okay. I just want to see you from a distance.]
[Please, this really means the world to me.]
I promised myself I would only send one message.
But I ended up sending a whole bunch anyway.
When I woke up, Ryan still hadn't replied.
I stared at the chat, just my messages piling up, me talking to myself, no reply in sight.
I let out a bitter laugh.
As I was scrolling through my feed, I suddenly saw a post from my sister, Jessica Lewis.
It was a selfie of her with Ryan.
She was clutching a bunch of roses, leaning into Ryan's arms, grinning so sweetly she put the flowers to shame.
She posted: [Thanks, Ryan, for coming all the way to pick me up at the airport. These roses are amazing. I'm totally obsessed.]
Ryan replied: [If you like them, I'll bring you more tomorrow.]
Jessica replied, all playful: [Tomorrow, I want a different kind of flower.]
Ryan just replied with a single word: [Okay.]
I glanced at the time.
It was just past nine in the morning.
Ryan was always a bear when he first woke up; he absolutely hated getting up early.
But for Jessica, he was willing to drag himself out of bed at the crack of dawn.
Maybe this was what true love looked like.
The comments were blowing up.
[Are they making it official?]
[Is the dream girl back home?]
[Chapter 1: Back Home!]
[Chapter 2: Taking Back Everything That's Mine!]
[Got hit with a faceful of sweetness first thing in the morning.]
[Hey, what about her? Jessica's back and Julia hasn't even made a peep?]
[LOL, bet she wouldn't mind if Jessica just stayed gone forever, then she wouldn't have to fight for Ryan anymore.]
I stared at those comments.
They had it all wrong.
Ryan was mine to begin with.
It was my sister who stole him away.
I couldn't find my way home.
I stopped random people on the street and asked, "Where did all the houses go?
"Do you know where my home is?"
"Freak. Get away from me," someone yelled.
He shoved me down to the ground.
My arm got scraped up, and blood oozed out.
I burst into tears, feeling miserable, and called my boyfriend.
Ryan ignored my call.
I glanced at my phone.
The last time we spoke was last month.
I sent him a ton of texts, half a screen full.
He didn't reply to a single one.
Why?
How could Ryan not pick up my call?
How could he bear to just leave me like this?
I just couldn't let it go, so I kept dialing Ryan over and over.
I lost track of how many times I called.
Finally, he picked up.
"Ryan, where are you? Can you come get me? I'm lost, I can't find my way home," I said, my voice trembling.
The more I spoke, the more I couldn't hold back my tears, and before I knew it, I was crying.