Chapter 9 · Erased Name, Endless Remorse

Chapter 9

Emily stood beside Vivian, her eyes showing clear impatience.A few executives kept their heads down, pretending they were waiting for the elevator.The head of Administration clutched a folder, her fingers nervously tracing the cover.The head of Branding glanced at me, then at Vivian, and finally fixed her gaze on the aroma diffuser.The scent of aroma grew stronger in the air.It drowned out the machines' heat and the coffee aroma I was used to.The lab I'd spent countless late nights in suddenly felt unfamiliar.Vivian clutched her sleeve, her face drained of color. I felt like if I stared at her any longer, she might fall apart right in front of me.I opened the file.The leave dates were written out in black and white: six whole months.It started today and ran until two weeks after the IPO review wraps up.I stared at the dates as if a weight settled on my chest, growing heavier with every second.So they'd calculated the timing down to the last detail.This wasn't some spur-of-the-moment decision.They couldn't do this.I cut off that thought, leaving only a cold emptiness inside."Six months," I said.I flipped to the signature page.There was already a yellow sticky note right next to the signature line.It said, [Please confirm today, Ms. Shaw.]The note was so perfectly placed, it felt like the Administration had already mapped out exactly how I'd be shown the door.Charles's brow twitched. "It's only temporary. It lines up exactly with the IPO review."He paused for a moment."This is for your own good," he added.I looked up at him.There was exhaustion in his eyes, and a hint of frustration, as if he'd been backed into a corner.He always knew how to use that look on me.Whenever he showed a hint of weariness, I'd be the first to step back.I'd postpone meetings, bite back my words, and turn questions that needed his answer into a simple "never mind."Over time, "never mind" became my habit and his safety net."Evelyn, after today's press conference, people are definitely going to ask about who's presenting and who gets the credit. You've been under a lot of pressure lately, and I don't want you getting dragged into it," Charles said.I looked at him and suddenly remembered years ago.When Cloudspire's first product launch flopped, I froze in the client's conference room and couldn't get a word out.Charles stood up for me and said he'd handle everything.After that day, I thought he'd always be there for me.Now, he was still talking about protecting me.But this time, his idea of protection was kicking me out of my own company.Charles said, "Once things settle down, you'll always be the most important person at Cloudspire Technologies."The most important person. I glanced down at the Technical Advisor badge pinned to my chest.The plastic card holder pressed against my shirt, so light it felt like it didn't matter at all."Why does the most important person have to sit in the audience?" I asked.Charles frowned, "Can't you put the company first, this once?"His voice wasn't loud, but it struck like a nail, fixing me in place under everyone's stare.I almost laughed out loud.Put the company first, this once.How many times had I put Cloudspire Technologies first?When I put up my old house as collateral, all I could think was that the company had to stay together.When my stomach hurt so much I was crouched outside the lab, all I could think was that the prototype had to keep going.When investors suddenly demanded extra documents, all I could think was that Charles couldn't afford to lose.I was always thinking about everyone else.And now, they were the ones telling me to put the company first, again.Vivian suddenly coughed twice.Her cough was quiet, but it cut right through the silence between Charles and me.Emily quickly caught her arm to steady her. "Vivian, why do you look so pale?"Vivian shook her head. "Emily, I'm fine. Everyone is tired today. It's understandable that Evelyn's feeling down."If this leave thing is hard for you, I can tell the board it's all on me. That I'm not capable enough." As she spoke, she glanced at me, her eyes getting teary again.Emily's face darkened. "You're so weak, but you're still willing to take on the stress for the company. Meanwhile, some people only care about how unfair things are for themselves."I looked at them.Someone coughed.Someone showed concern.Someone stayed silent.What a flawless performance.I looked down and took out the blue fountain pen from my bag.The pen was old, and the chipped paint at the end had been polished shiny by years of my fingers.I set it down on the conference table beside me.The metal cap tapped against the table with a faint click.Everyone's eyes turned to me.Charles's expression shifted.He knew that pen all too well.On our first day, he used it to sign Cloudspire Technologies' first lease, then gave it to me.He said, "From now on, we'll sign every important document together."

Chapter 9