Chapter 1

In my third year of fighting cancer, with my life drawing to a close, I just wanted one last look at the old neighborhood where I lived with my parents.

But right at the entrance, I ran into my ex-wife.

Years had passed, and we had both changed.

She had taken off the hand-woven memory bracelet I once made for her, replacing it with an expensive diamond ring.

I had shaved off the side-part she used to love, wearing a beanie to hide my bald head from the chemo drips.

We stared at each other for a moment before forcing out a greeting.

As we brushed past each other, Claire suddenly called out to me.

"Do you still resent me, Ethan?"

I gave a weak smile and shook my head.

To resent someone means you still care.

And my capacity to love had dried up a long time ago.

I didn't look back. I just walked into the neighborhood.

I wanted to keep my final days to myself.

For the home that once gave me happiness.

I walked slowly toward the front door.

This was the old factory housing estate my parents moved into before they got married. I was born here. I grew up here.

Even after my dad became the plant manager at the Riverbend Steel Parts Factory, we never moved.

All because Claire lived right next door.

I crouched down and reached under the flowerpot. My fingers brushed against empty concrete.

A second later, a hand gripped my arm and pulled me up.

I turned my head. Claire was standing right there.

"Your hands are freezing."

I yanked my arm back and took a step away.

Claire stared at me, then pulled a pair of knit gloves from her coat pocket. There was a leaf embroidered on the cuff. I recognized the stitching. It was Noah’s handiwork.

I shoved my hands deep into my pockets.

"I'm fine."

"You hate the cold. Your knuckles always crack when—"

She stopped mid-sentence, her eyes dropping to the embroidery on the gloves. Slowly, she tucked them away.

"Forgot your key again?"

I nodded.

Claire offered to walk with me to the factory's admin office to get the spare, just like we used to do in high school.

But we weren't in high school anymore. There was no reason for us to walk side by side.

Claire and I were strangers now.

Just then, a middle-aged man drove by on a maintenance utility cart. I flagged him down and asked for a ride. The cart had a sturdy flatbed in the back, enough to get me to the admin building.

He agreed easily. After driving a few yards, he glanced back over his shoulder.

"Lover's spat?"

He nodded toward Claire, who was still standing there, watching us.

"See her waiting at the gate all the time. Looked like she saw a ghost when you climbed on. If it's just a fight, don't leave her hanging."

I swallowed the metallic taste of blood rising in my throat and pulled my coat tighter.

"She's not my girlfriend. We divorced eight years ago."

"She lives here. Whoever she's waiting for, it isn't me."

The driver gave an awkward chuckle and quickly changed the subject.

"You used to live around here too, Ethan?"

"Shame you waited till October. Should've come down in the summer. Water in the Ohio River is perfect then."

I looked back. Claire had faded into a blurry speck in the distance.

A blink later, she was gone completely.

I rubbed the hem of my coat and let out a bitter smile.

"I wanted to."

"But August was my mother's funeral. September was a blur of chemo drips. Before I knew it, it was October."

The driver—Tom—shut his mouth instantly. His face flushed with apology.

"It's okay, Tom. Thank you."

Ever since my diagnosis, people either pitied me for dying so young or looked at me like a stray dog with nowhere to go.

But I didn't care.

The day I divorced Claire, I stopped caring about what anyone thought.

Tom drove in silence until we reached the admin office.

I thanked him and was about to step off when he called my name. He hesitated, keeping his voice low.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. But man... she looked like she was terrified for you."

I stood there in the cold air for a long time before I spoke.

"I left her because I caught her in bed with my best friend."