Chapter 1

"Go get a paternity test," Philip said.

I'd just managed to get my baby to sleep when Philip Ball handed me a form.

It was my first day after the month-long recovery. Forty-two days. I'd made it through the 3 a.m. feedings, the pain from my milk coming in, and all those lonely nights with no one to lend a hand.

I thought he was here to take me back to our bedroom.

"A paternity test?" I whispered, afraid of waking the baby.

"Mom says the baby doesn't look like me," Philip said, his eyes locked on the crib, not even looking at me. "Let's just do it, so we won't have trouble down the road."

I gripped the form, the sharp edge pressing into my palm, hurting a little.

Forty-two days ago, I was lying alone in the delivery room, drenched in sweat from the pain of contractions. Philip was outside, making business calls.

And now, he was standing right in front of me, asking me to prove the baby was his.

"Okay," I said.

He paused, clearly caught off guard by how quickly I agreed.

"I'll take you both tomorrow," Philip said, turning to leave. Then he stopped and glanced back. "If it weren't for me, this family would've fallen apart ages ago. You know that."

The door closed behind him.

I stared at the form in my hands for a long time.

*****

My mother-in-law, Janice, came by in the afternoon.

She stood by the crib, studying the baby for a long time before pursing her lips.

"Those eyes. They don't look like any of the Ball family," Janice said.

I was folding the baby's clothes when my hands froze for a second. I stayed silent.

"I told you, Philip's got it all. There are so many girls at the factory chasing after him, but he just had to marry you," Janice said, her voice just loud enough for me to catch every word. "You two only knew each other for three months before getting married. Who knows—"

"Mom," Philip said, stepping out of the room and cutting her off.

I thought he was going to stand up for me.

"The paternity test is set for tomorrow," Philip said.

Janice nodded, clearly pleased, and gave me another look. "Once the test proves everything's fine, I can finally stop worrying every day."

I put the folded clothes away in the cabinet. "Got it."

"Look at you, so rude," Janice said as she sat down on the couch. "My son's been taking care of you, and you still dare to give me attitude?

"How much does he even make a month? Honestly, it's the Ball family that's supporting you and the baby."

I kept quiet.

I remembered three years ago, when I quit my job at the design firm. I was making 4 grand a month. Philip told me women should focus on family. Janice said working was exhausting, and staying home with the baby was way better.

I believed them.

Three years had gone by. I went from being a designer to a stay-at-home mom. All my client contacts, industry connections, and portfolio are locked away in a folder I haven't touched since.

All they ever remember is that I don't earn any money.

"Don't bother with the money stuff, I'm solid," Philip said, grabbing his car keys. "I've got a business dinner tonight, so don't wait up for me."

The door closed again.

I stood in the living room, watching as Janice cranked the TV up to full volume.

The baby in the crib was startled awake, his cries piercing the air.

"Aren't you going to soothe her?" Janice said, not even bothering to turn around. "Can't even handle something so simple as a mom."

I walked over and picked the baby up.

On the coffee table sat a manila envelope I'd found while tidying up. I hadn't opened it, but I knew exactly what was inside.

That was my way out.

The paternity testing center was downtown, and they had to take blood samples.

The baby was so tiny that the nurse had to prick his heel for the sample. He wailed in agony, but Philip just stood there, stone-faced and unmoved.

"The results will be ready in seven business days," the nurse said.

On the way back, we walked past a shopping center. Janice stopped at the entrance to chat with a few older ladies.

They were her poker buddies.

"Your daughter-in-law finished her recovery month? She doesn't look so great," one of the ladies said.

"How could she look good?" Janice replied, her voice low, but I paused and caught every word. "My son's got everything going for him, and she's lucky to have married up. Still, she acts like she's something special, always giving me attitude."

"Who does the baby look like?" one of the ladies asked.

"Who knows?" Janice let out a sigh, sounding all mysterious. "But she sure doesn't look anything like Philip. We went and got a paternity test done today."

"A paternity test?" The ladies' voices dropped, whispering with barely contained excitement. "No way... You mean..."

"I didn't say anything." Janice waved her hand, brushing it off. "Just checking, you know. You can't trust people these days. Who knows if those women out there are really clean."

I stood about ten feet away, holding the baby in my arms.

The baby was asleep, his eyelashes fluttering softly.

Philip was off to the side, glued to his phone, acting like he didn't hear a thing—or maybe he just didn't care. 'Typical,' I thought.

"I'm going back to my room," I said.

No one even bothered to respond.

That night, I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling.

My phone lit up with a message from Sienna.

[Trina, whenever you're ready, just come back. We're short-staffed for a new project, and I've saved a spot for you,] Sienna texted.

Sienna was my old colleague, now a partner at the design firm. Three years ago, she told me not to quit, but I ignored her. Ever since, she'd check in every few months, seeing if I was ready to come back.

I read her message, but left it unanswered.