Chapter 3

But the System's sudden forced separation happened during the baby's hundred-day celebration, right before Nigel's eyes.

At our last moment together, the baby was crying nonstop. Nigel crumbled to the ground as he watched me disappear.

I didn't even get to say goodbye.

I'd imagined our reunion countless times, but fate always seemed to play tricks on me.

Seeing how close Nigel was to that woman, I could only stand there.

The moment that fresh soap scent hit my nose, tears streamed down my face.

But I didn't even have the right to confront him.

I knew the woman by his side. She was his therapist and our baby's preschool teacher.

When Nigel's delusions hit their peak, all the doctors refused to treat him.

This woman threw caution to the wind, bursting into the hospital room and placing the crying baby in his arms.

Nigel gazed at the baby, his fingers gently brushing over the baby's brows and eyes. In the end, he hugged the baby tight and sobbed uncontrollably.

After that, he began to slowly quit the meds.

Whenever the pain became too much, he'd sit in the therapy room, staring into nothingness, quietly recounting memories of us to himself.

She was his therapist and the only person he could truly confide in.

Six years felt short since I had lost myself in the endless grind of missions.

But six years also felt so long that I barely recognized who Nigel was anymore.

I was settled into one of his newly purchased places. It was a big, open-plan apartment, the kind I always loved.

Standing by the floor-to-ceiling windows, I quietly watched him moving around the kitchen as he cooked.

I couldn't bring myself to ask him about his relationship with that woman.

It hit me then that I was such a scaredy-cat.

I was terrified to find out the truth about them, and even more scared that I wouldn't be able to keep playing dumb and stay close to him.

"Go wash up and come eat," he called out.

The soft, golden light cast a gentle glow over his face. He looked as warm as ever. My nose burned with the urge to cry.

Seeing those familiar dishes on the table, my heart felt so soft and full it almost hurt.

These were his signature dishes. They were also my favorite food.

But as I took a bite, tears quietly fell onto my food.

The dishes were still the same, but they no longer had the flavor I loved.

I'd always preferred strong flavors, but tonight everything tasted so faint that I could barely tell what I was eating.

It finally dawned on Nigel. He set down his fork. "Celia, let's eat out instead. Some new restaurants look pretty good."

I couldn't even tell how I managed to say no to him, or how awkward my smile really was.

"I'm tired. I want to rest," I said.

I lay quietly in the master bedroom. Nigel tucked me in like he used to. "The thermostat's set, so don't kick the covers off again tonight."

As Nigel stood up, I reached out and grabbed his wrist. "Aren't you staying here tonight?"

He gently patted the back of my hand. "I've got some work to finish up. You go ahead and get some sleep."

Watching his back as he walked away, I turned over. "I want to see the baby tomorrow."

After a long pause, he replied, "Okay."

It was a long while before the door finally closed behind him.

Tears pooled in my ear as I blinked.

I was not usually the type to cry, but ever since we reunited, I couldn't seem to stop.

Separated by nothing but a thin wall, I stayed awake until dawn in my room, while he spent the whole night restless in his.

Early morning, I could hear him moving around in the kitchen.

I walked out of my room, a little stunned, and saw a brand-new phone, fresh clothes, and all the skincare products I used to love, neatly arranged in the living room.

He was still in the kitchen, making breakfast for me.

He still took care of everything, like he always did.

He still agreed to anything I wanted.

However, his love for me had quietly faded away.

He placed the steaming oatmeal on the table, smiling gently at me. "Try it now."

This time, it tasted the way I liked. He'd gotten up early and tweaked the recipe over and over to make it perfect for me.

I set down my spoon and looked him straight in the eye. "Nigel, are you happy?"

He looked really sad. I wondered if I should have stayed away.

He looked at me for a moment, then slowly turned his gaze away.

Nigel said, "The first year after you left, I spent countless nights wide awake. Sometimes, I'd even have hallucinations.

"By the third year, I'd still think of you from time to time. Whenever I did, I'd touch the baby's face. Her eyes and brows are like yours.

"By the sixth year, I could finally accept everything. I followed the routine, day after day."

He paused, his eyes unfocused, staring into nothing.

"Celia, I'm just confused. I really don't know what to do anymore," Nigel said.

My chest felt heavy, like a stone pressing down on my heart. My throat tightened again and again, but in the end, I couldn't say a word.

I stared at him, frozen. I didn't even dare to let myself cry.

The doorbell broke the silence.

He stood up and went to open the door. "Our baby is here.

"She's really missed you."