Chapter 3

Back in the dorm, my roommate Emily Brooks was sprawled out on her bed, watching dramas.

I dropped my bag and asked, "Emily, do you know Ethan Cole from the economics department? He's a freshman."

Emily looked a little surprised. "Ethan Cole? The super poor guy?"

I nodded.

Emily lowered her voice. "His mom has kidney failure and needs dialysis three times a week. His dad works construction, but his pay is always late. And..." She leaned in, all secretive. "I heard his background is pretty complicated."

My chest tightened. "What do you mean?" I asked, trying to sound casual.

"My boyfriend said he saw Ethan talking to some sketchy guys outside school once. Looked like they were arguing. After that, those guys started steering clear of him." Emily shrugged. "Seriously, just watch out. Guys with messy family stuff like that? Better not get involved."

I just smiled, keeping my thoughts to myself.

If she had any idea what Ethan would turn into ten years from now, she'd probably be calling the cops already.

On Sunday, when the Humanities Society was taking new members, Ethan showed up a full thirty minutes early.

He wore a simple white shirt and faded jeans, standing at the club room door, all nervous, like he was about to be grilled by a panel.

"You're early," I said, heading over to unlock the door.

"Didn't want to be late," he said, trailing after me inside, his eyes roaming over the shelves like he'd just walked into a treasure trove.

I handed him the application form. "Just fill it out and hand it to me when you're done. Relax. The president's my roommate. I've already put in a good word for you."

While Ethan was busy with the form, I kept stealing glances at him whenever he wasn't looking.

His lashes were so long they almost shimmered in the sunlight, and his fingers were slender yet steady as he wrote.

How did these hands end up pulling a trigger one day?

He handed me the form and then, out of nowhere, asked, "Why are you being so nice to me?"

I froze for a second, totally caught off guard. "What do you mean?"

"You know, things at the café, and now you're getting me into this society..." Ethan met my eyes, not looking away. "Are you sure we've never met before?"

His stare was so intense, it was almost overwhelming. "Maybe we bumped into each other at a lecture or something? Honestly, I don't remember."

"That's weird," Ethan said quietly. "There's something about you that feels really familiar, especially the way you look at me... like you've known me forever."

My palms started to sweat.

I hurried to change the subject. "The Humanities Society is taking a trip to Stony Ridge Abbey next Saturday. You should come with us," I said. "And if you want to bring a friend, go ahead. The club will cover everything."

Ethan dimmed. "I'd like to go, but I need to stay close to home. My mom's not doing well, and I usually help out on weekends."

"You should still come. Come on, you need a break," I said quickly. "I heard they have an amazing little bakery on the grounds. People drive out there just for the bread."

He hesitated for a second and then nodded. "Yeah, I'll come."

After Ethan left, I collapsed into a chair, my heart pounding like crazy.

This young Ethan was scary sharp. I had to be even more careful. I couldn't let him notice anything off.

But at the same time, a bigger question started gnawing at me. Was I really just here to keep him from going down that dark path? Why did it ache to see him worrying about his mom's medical bills? And why did my heart skip a beat every time he smiled?

This wasn't part of the plan.

I opened Ethan's application, and under "Favorite Book," he had written Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl.

He was someone who would end up with blood on his hands, and his favorite book was a memoir about surviving the camps and searching for meaning?

I closed the form and shut my eyes.

When did Ethan start to change in my last life? Was there any way I could rewrite his fate this time?

The day we headed out to Stony Ridge Abbey, the weather report had promised nothing but sunshine.

I stood by the bus at the campus gate, ticking off names and sneaking glances down the street every few seconds.

Ethan said he'd be here, but with just five minutes to go before departure, he was still nowhere in sight.

"Everyone here yet?" Emily, our club president, asked, popping her gum.

"Still missing—" I started to say.

"Sophia!"

Ethan came jogging over, sweat beading on his forehead.

He was wearing a deep blue T-shirt that made his skin look extra fair, and had a worn army-green backpack slung over his shoulder.

"Sorry. My mom wasn't feeling well this morning, so I got held up," he said, a little out of breath.

"No worries. You made it just in time," I said, handing him a bottle of water and ignoring the curious look Emily shot my way.

On the bus ride, Ethan sat next to me, quietly staring out the window. Patches of sunlight danced across his face, making his features look softer and almost unreal.

I kept sneaking peeks at him. At this age, there was no trace of cigarettes on him, none of that heavy, dangerous aura he'd have later. All he had was that clean, boyish scent and the kind of freshness you only find in someone this young.

Stony Ridge Abbey sat halfway up Misty Hill just outside the city, and the only way to reach it was by hiking a steep trail, part dirt path and part uneven stone steps.