Chapter 3

Maybe because of the chaos at the birthday party, that night, I tossed and turned and couldn't get a wink of sleep.

My dreams were a jumble.

The next morning, I rolled in late to the morning study hall.

Chloe saw how out of it I was and looked worried. "Didn't get much sleep last night?"

I pulled out my worksheet, but my mind was totally blank. I couldn't write a single word.

So I turned to her and asked, "Hey, Chloe, if you screwed someone over first, and then they screwed you back, how do you settle that?"

That was pretty much the drama between Nathan and me.

All the trouble from my previous life started right here.

Nathan had always dreamed of joining the Navy.

When it came time to apply for college, he was all set to go to a military academy.

But his family wouldn't let him.

He was the Carter Family's one and only, the apple of their eye.

Dina Carter, his grandma, doted on him and thought joining the military was tough, exhausting, and dangerous.

So she and Olivia Carter, Nathan's mom, came to me. They couldn't persuade him, so they made me go ahead and change Nathan's application behind his back.

They said if he changed his application, he'd be able to study in Capital City with me, and we'd get married after graduation. I was tempted.

The Wynn and Carter families had been close for generations, and our marriage was basically arranged from the start.

It wasn't something I could say no to, and Nathan couldn't either.

With Olivia and the others backing it up, it was basically set in stone.

I just wasn't thinking straight back then.

Later, when Nathan found out his application had been changed, he locked himself in his room for three days, refusing to eat or drink.

After he was rushed to the hospital, the first thing he said when he woke up was, "Emily, I really hate you."

After college, I finally got my wish. I became Nathan's wife.

After we got married, I saw him countless times, holed up in his study, just staring at sailing videos.

That was when it finally hit me that I'd really screwed up.

I'd stolen his dream and left him with nothing but regret for my own selfish reasons.

He had every right to hate me, and I couldn't even blame him.

But we were childhood friends, and had spent years as husband and wife. I thought that meant something.

When I was trapped in that fire, fighting for my life, Nathan ignored my desperate calls and let the flames take me.

I couldn't let it go.

I hated him, too.

Chloe tilted her head, thinking for a moment. "Do you hate him?" she asked.

I nodded and added, "Yeah, I hated him back then. But once I cooled off, I realized we both made mistakes. Now, I just want nothing to do with him anymore."

Chloe smiled and gave my shoulder a reassuring pat.

She seemed to get it. "You're talking about you and Nathan, right? I mean, I don't really know what happened between you two, but Emily, hating someone takes a lot out of energy.

"Hating someone really wears you out," Chloe said.

She was right.

I finally cracked a smile.

Chloe was right. Holding onto hate just drained me.

Now that I'd got a second shot at life, all I wanted was to live for myself this time.

A life where Nathan and I never cross paths again.

I didn't want to hate him anymore.

I was done wasting my time on him.

I'd let it be.

After all, I was the one who wronged him first in my last life.

We were each other's curse.

*****

After morning study, our homeroom teacher finally announced the big exams coming up at the end of the year.

I told Chloe I was going to transfer to the International Division next semester.

I planned to head overseas for university right after taking my final high school exams.

She stared at me, totally stunned. She never expected I'd actually go through with breaking things off with Nathan for good.

Just then, Nathan walked over.

He was carrying a pink box of tiramisu, looking pretty uncomfortable.

"Emily, could you give up your spot in the competition in a few days for Sophia?" he asked. "She wants to get into the top class, too.

"You're way better than her, and you'll stay in the top class no matter what, so you don't even need this spot."

Honestly, hearing Nathan say that made me nearly throw up.

Getting into the top class at Central High was intensely competitive.

Good grades alone weren't enough.

Everyone in the class had multiple competition medals.

And Sophia happened to need that spot to compete.

I remembered the last rankings. Only three spots were available. I ranked third, and Sophia was right behind me.

I shot Nathan a cold look. "Just because she wants it, I have to give it to her? What if I need it myself?"

It was already late in the second semester of sophomore year, and switching classes now would put me at a real disadvantage.

But if I wanted to cut Nathan out of my life for good, and chase my own dreams at a top university overseas, this was the only way.

I needed that competition spot.

If I nailed it, it would get me straight into the top class at the International Division.

I'd been prepping for this exam nonstop ever since I was reborn.

But I never thought Nathan would actually play dirty, just to help Sophia get her hands on that spot.

*****

The competition was scheduled for the afternoon, right after PE class.

After I finished putting the equipment away and tried to head out, I realized the door wouldn't open.

I was locked inside the equipment room.

Then I heard Nathan's voice from outside. "Emily, sorry, just hang tight for a bit. I'll let you out after Sophia finishes her exam."

My eyes were stinging, tears threatening to spill.

This exam was crucial for me, too.

"Nathan! Open the door!" I shouted, "Let me out!"

I broke down, screaming, "Let me out!"

I kicked the door hard, desperation clawing at me.

Outside, there was nothing but silence.

It was freezing in the equipment room, winter cold seeping into my bones.

I figured I'd be right back, so I didn't even bring my jacket.

I waited for ages.

By the time the sun went down, I was nearly frozen to death, but Nathan never showed up.