Chapter 4

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She pressed herself into the wall. "I-i"

"Please don't blame Aurora. It wasn't her fault that the drink was messed up." I interrupted, afraid that if I hastily revealed everything, she would be alerted and everything will be in vain.

Besides,

I could have prevented this.

All I needed was a contraceptive, but I was so foolishly in love with Elio that I wanted to tie him down with a child.

It turns out that the man that came to my room was Vance. Elio had told me himself after I lost the baby. I remember going after Vance and blaming him for touching me.

I closed my eyes briefly.

"I should have controlled myself." Vance added, jaw tight.

Dad pressed a hand to his temple, brow pinched as if he was in pain. "Dad i-" I reached for him, but he lifted a hand to stop me.

My nails dug into my palm, I really didn't want to go through this, not after losing him, however this was just inevitable, not only so I could be with Vance, but also because it would aid me in my revenge.

Vance pulled me to my feet and took me out of the room. Thankfully, Aurora also tactically followed. "I am sorry, Vance. This is all my fault." My voice cracked.

His jaw clenched, but I couldn't pinpoint who his anger was directed to. "Go to your room for now. I will speak to your Dad."

I parted my lips to refute, but then, I realized that being there wouldn't help, so I nodded. I watched him for a brief second, the way his eyes flickered in-between green and blue.

This little action had always fascinated me as a kid. Hesitantly, I stepped closer, fearing he would push me away, when he didn't, I wrapped my arms around his torso and laid my head on his chest.

The one year we spent together before he died in our past life had been filled with moments like this. Watching each other suffer and then holding ourselves once we were alone.

The warmth from his broad and reliable chest compelled me to want to stay in this moment forever. He didn't hold me, but he didn't push me away either.

It was enough.

I pulled away from him and turned around resolutely without turning back, not even when I felt his burning gaze follow me until I was out of his sight.

Once we reached the hallway leading to my room, I paused and turned to Aurora, who in turn took a step back. "Can you get me a glass of warm milk, I don't feel too good."

"Oh-ok." She didn't waste a moment before walking away. I made sure she was gone before making my next move.

Unlike Vance had instructed, I didn't go to my room, instead, I went in search of the butler, Mr Alfred. "Well, you look lovely today Miss Rave." He greeted, in his French accent, eyes sparkling as he smiled.

My chest warmed at the nickname.

"Thank you Alfred." Seeing him again brought a sour feeling, he had been killed while trying to shield Dad from death. "I have something to discuss with you, are you available?"

"Of course, Miss Rave, shall we head to the bar to discuss?"

I made sure the bar was empty, before instructing him on what I needed.

First, I told him about my suspicion that Aurora had pushed me into the water, then I added something vague about hearing her order for some strange drugs. Of course, someone like her needed to be kept close.

"Don't alert the mouse. Just make sure to watch her." I instructed.

Alfred's expression changed several times the more he heard me speak, but he didn't look surprised and he even hesitated a little before responding. "Of course, Miss."

My eyes narrowed. Why was he reacting like this? "Is something wrong?"

"No-of course not, I just can't believe that Aurora had such a thing in mind."

After saying a few more exchanges, I headed towards my room, and even then, I couldn't shake off the feeling that Alfred had reacted weirdly.

Vance was there when I walked in. He was pacing by my bedside. "Hey."

He examined me. "Where were you?"

"How is Dad?"

"He needs some time to take it all in."

A sour feeling rose within me. "He doesn't want to talk to me does he?"

His left eye twitched. "He is your Dad. It doesn't matter how disappointed he is, you will always be his pumpkin."

Instead of a response, I leaned closer, gaze fixed on his. "Elio threatened you to keep quiet about that night, didn't he?"

His breath hitched, his composure cracking just slightly. But then he scoffed. "Would you believe me if I said he did?"

I took a step forward at his words, brow pulled together. "I believe you."

Vance shook his head, a frown crossing his face. "What are you playing at, Raven? First, you kissed me, then you held me like... Like I am someone you love and now..." He looked away, jaw tight. "Is this a joke to you?"

I shook my head. "No, I don't see you as a joke, Vance. I..." I couldn't complete my words. What was I about to say?

That I loved him?

Did I?

Even if I did, what would it amount to?

This wasn't my past life. And the Vance standing before me wasn't the same Vance that cried helplessly when I was being whipped, he wasn't the same man I went through hell with.

"You what, Raven?" The hope in his eyes died when I didn't respond. "Is there some kind of reason behind this? Are you doing this to make me leave the Autumn project to Elio?"

"No, I would never-"

"Then is this because of the baby?" His gaze trailed to my stomach, his thumb grazing the ring again. "If it is, then you don't have to force yourself to stay with me."

"We are both adults, there's no need to be sorry about it. Besides, Elio was the one who had Aurora drug you."

"It wasn't you?" He drew in a deep breath. “Then why did you lie?"

I stayed quiet. Even if I told him the truth, he wouldn't believe me.

"You don't want anyone to find out that Elio did it?" He took a step forward, voice thick like he was holding himself back. "Elio doesn't love you, can't you see that? If he did, he wouldn't have pushed you into the arms of another man."

"I know he doesn't love me." My voice broke. "And I don't want him anymore." I grabbed his hand, desperation making me hold him tighter, hoping that he would see that I was no longer the same naive girl who chased after Elio. "Please, Vance, can you trust me just this once?"

He looked into my eyes without a response and that hurt more than anything he would have said.

A quiet, broken exhale left me.

I let go of his hand and turned my back to him, a hand placed on my belly.

"Do you not want the baby? Is that why you are saying all this? "

Dad was against us, so will the whole world when the truth comes out. I wasn't afraid of that, but the possibility of being abandoned by him just...

My breath came in shallow as though preparing me for his rejection.

"Raven i-"

A knock cut his sentence short, Aurora walked in a moment later. "Here is your warm milk."

I didn't take it. "Leave-"

The door was yanked open. I lifted my head, thinking it was Dad, but the moment I laid my eyes on the man standing by my door, something ugly curled within me.

"Elio." Aurora called brightly, her whole demeanor changing.

For a heartbeat, I stayed still, my breath coming out heavy as I remembered the torture he had put me through.

All thoughts about being calm flew out of my mind, and a violent tremor ran through my soul. By the time I lunged at him, it was too late to stop. "You bastard!" The word exploded out as my palm connected with his cheek.

~P-Lia~