Chapter 1
The general brought me a bowl of herbal medicine to protect my pregnancy. I drank it without a second thought.
The day I lost my child, he stood at the gate of my courtyard, supporting his concubine.
"You're still weak. Just focus on getting better for now," he said.
He spoke so lightly, as if what I'd lost was nothing more than a lamp.
I didn't shed a tear or utter a word of complaint. From then on, I cooked every meal for him every day.
On the day his concubine reached eight months of pregnancy, the entire estate was decorated with festive lights.
Suddenly, the royal physician dropped to the ground. "General of Protection, you may never have children again in this lifetime."
I gently rested my hand on my belly and looked up at him.
"You took my child from me, so I'll make sure your bloodline ends with you," I said.
*****
Russ Marrow brought me a bowl of herbal medicine to protect my pregnancy.
The dark medicine shimmered slightly in the gold-trimmed porcelain bowl.
He said, "Lucy, drink it. It's good for you and the baby."
I looked at him. He was my husband, whom I'd loved for five years.
He was the legendary General of Protection. He was everything to me.
I drank it without a second thought.
The bitter medicine slid down my throat, and I even managed a smile for him.
"Thank you, General," I said.
He nodded, then turned and walked away, his posture always so rigid, so distant.
Two hours later, a searing pain tore through my abdomen.
It felt like countless knives were ripping me apart from the inside.
Blood gushed out from between my legs.
It soaked my white dress and turned my whole world crimson.
The royal physician and the midwife rushed in. Everything descended into chaos.
I lay on the bed, the pain so overwhelming that I went completely numb.
Bright spots flashed in front of my eyes, and my ears were ringing nonstop.
I just stared at the tassels above my bed.
The day I lost my child, he stood at the gate of my courtyard, supporting his concubine.
I'd just miscarried, and my body was so weak I could barely move. The stench of blood still hung in the air.
But I still managed to crawl to the window, fighting through the pain.
Russ stood there, tall like a wall, shielding the woman by his side.
Her name was Abigail.
Abigail was the most famous dancer in Landskaria and Russ's concubine.
Right then, she wore a simple white dress, her face ghostly pale, resting weakly in Russ's arms, so fragile she looked like she could fall apart any moment.
It was as if a single gust of wind could send her tumbling.
The guards at my courtyard gate blocked their way.
Russ's brow furrowed, his voice laced with impatience.
"You're still weak. Just focus on getting better for now."
He said it with complete indifference, as if it meant nothing at all.
His words were like an ice-cold blade, slicing straight into my heart.
He wasn't speaking to me.
He was saying it to Abigail, or maybe to everyone in the mansion.
He stood there, holding the woman he loved, and on the very day I lost my child, he made sure everyone saw my defeat.
I was just a useless, weak woman who couldn't even protect her own child.
Suddenly, I felt nothing at all, not a trace of pain.
It was like my body and my heart had both gone completely numb.
All the love, all the hope, and all the struggle faded away with the child who never even had a chance to exist at that moment.
I dragged myself away from the window, feeling empty inside.
I lay back down on the bed and closed my eyes.
I didn't cry or scream.
I just felt like this lavish mansion and this beautiful room were as cold and lifeless as a tomb.
My maid, Juliet, came in with her eyes swollen from crying, carrying a bowl of soup.
"Lady Lucy, please drink some. If you keep going like this, your health will collapse," Juliet said.
I opened my eyes and looked at her.
Her face was full of concern and helplessness.
I took the bowl and slowly sipped the soup.
It was scalding, but I couldn't feel a thing.
"Juliet," I said softly.
"Yes, Lady Lucy," Juliet replied.
"Starting tomorrow, I'll cook all of General's meals myself," I said.
Juliet looked up suddenly, her eyes wide with disbelief.
"Are you out of your mind? You need to rest and recover. General Marrow..."
"What about him?" I asked, my gaze calm and steady.
Juliet faltered under my look, the rest of her words dying in her throat.
Juliet didn't understand.
No one would ever understand.
Everyone thought I was just humiliating myself, desperate to win Russ's heart back.
Only I knew what was going on.
My heart was already dead.
It died in that bowl of medicine meant to protect my pregnancy.
It died when he stood at my courtyard gate, holding another woman.
Now, I was just a shell, living only for revenge.
A bowl of medicine took my child away from me.