Chapter 1

In my past life, I made the mistake of choosing the most dazzling snow leopard as my mate. He watched coldly as my soul was torn from my body and I died alone in a hospital bed. His parting words was cruel. "Your soul stinks."

Now that I get a second chance, I refuse to make the same mistake. When the crowd flocks around Carter, I walk right past him and grab the battle-scarred grey wolf hiding in the shadows. I announce, "I choose him."

My sister is shocked to hear that, and Carter sees red. No one expects the shattered wolf no one cared for would shatter the chains of Sanctuary for me or help me crush every last enemy underfoot. This life, I'm taking everything they owe me. Blood will have blood!

*****

I lay in the hospital bed, the steady beeping of the monitors filling the room. The ceiling, the walls, the sheets—everything was almost too bright to bear, except for the silent figure in the corner.

He was Carter White, my snow leopard beastman mate—the one I chose at my coming-of-age ceremony five years back. Right now, he was leaning against the wall, his silver-gray fur nearly blending into the background, his golden eyes cold as he stared out the window, like I was a stranger to him, even as I lay dying.

A fit of coughing hit me, and I doubled over in pain, the metallic taste of blood filling my mouth.

Carter didn't even bother to look my way.

The door was gently pushed open, and my sister, Rachel Lynn, walked in, her heels clicking on the floor. The scent of her perfume instantly drowned out the hospital's antiseptic smell.

"Ash, how are you?" she asked, her voice dripping with fake concern as she leaned over my bed. Her bright red nails tapped lightly on my blanket, but her eyes kept sneaking glances toward the corner.

She was the same every single time we'd met over the past five years.

And what really made me sick was that Carter, who had always ignored me, actually turned his head a little, a glimmer of light flashing through those cold, golden eyes.

It vanished in a heartbeat, but I caught it—that tiny bit of attention I'd longed for all these years, but I never once received.

"Rachel..." I forced the words out, my voice so hoarse that it barely sounded like me. "Could you give Carter and me a moment alone?"

Rachel pouted, clearly reluctant, but she left the room anyway.

Once she was gone, it was just the two of us again. I struggled to sit up, every muscle in my body protesting.

"Carter," I called his name, just like I had so many times before, hoping for a response that never came.

But to my surprise, this time, he moved. Carter strode over with grace and towered over me, his eyes filled with emotions I couldn't even begin to read.

"Why?" I finally asked the question I'd been bottling up for five years. "Why do you always look right through me? Why do you hate me? What did I ever do to make you—"

"Your soul," he cut me off in a low and icy voice. "It stinks of something black and rotten."

I stared at him, my eyes wide with disbelief.

"I saw it the very first time I met you," he said, disgust flickering in his eyes. "That darkness makes me sick."

Those words shattered me completely. Agony ripped through my chest, and the monitor shrieked in alarm. Everything started to fade as the nurses burst in, but the last thing I saw was Carter's retreating back.

I refused to accept it... I couldn't stand it...

"Ash, get up. Today's your come-of-age ceremony. If you don't hurry, you'll be late."

My mom's voice pierced through my dreams, snapping me awake. I shot upright, gasping for breath, my hands trembling as I felt my chest. I felt no pain, no medical tubes, just a healthy heartbeat and smooth skin.

I glanced around. This wasn't my apartment after I moved out—it was my old bedroom at my parents's place. The calendar on the wall practically showed a date from five years ago.

Did I really come back to the past? Was I back on the day of the beastman selection ceremony?

"What are you spacing out for?" Rachel walked in, already looking drop-dead gorgeous. "Hurry up. I don't want to be late because of you." She gave me a quick once-over, a flicker of disdain in her eyes. "It's your big day. At least dress up, okay?"

On the very day in my previous life, I was so nervous that I could barely think straight. I ended up picking the most attention-grabbing snow leopard beastman, Carter, at the ceremony, and that kicked off five years of hell for me.

But this time, things were gonna be different.

"I'll be ready in a sec," I said, flashing Rachel a smile, already plotting my next move in my head.

The place was all glitz and glam, packed with every 18-year-old person, all here to choose their beastman mate. The beastmen stood on display. Each of them was different—graceful felines, strong bears, quick canines...

I let my gaze slide right past Carter, who was front and center. The snow leopard beastman was impossible to miss, his silver-gray fur catching the light, those golden eyes sweeping the crowd with that trademark arrogance.

Back then, I'd been totally fooled by his looks.

I kept searching and finally spotted him—shoved all the way to the edge. He was a gray wolf beastman, covered in scars, his left ear torn, clearly outcast by the others.

The staff hadn't even bothered to clean him up, leaving his fur a mess and making him look even more like a stray.

His name tag read "Damian Frost".

In my previous life, I never even noticed him. It was only later that I heard his story—a dangerous beastman who was put down for turning on his master.